Chapter 09 Between Good and Evil

The next thing I am about to say may be somewhat direct and might make you feel uncomfortable. Would you prefer that I continue speaking with the microphone on, or shall we discuss this privately

During peak hours after work, it becomes increasingly difficult to hail a taxi, and traffic congestion is common, making it preferable to take the subway

Her face suddenly turned as pale as snow, and her gaze shifted to her husband. After a moment, she bit her lip hard and nodded: "What do you want to say?"

Upon arriving at the television station, she was greeted by the familiar makeup artist who prepared her. As soon as the young girl saw her, she smiled and said: "Miss Xia, have you changed your hairstyle?"

She felt as if her mind was a complete muddle today, unable to recall at all why Su Ruhao was here. After standing in silence for a while, she finally spoke to him: "What are you doing here?"

Xia Huixi carefully observed the young woman sitting in front of her. With a graceful figure, cascading long hair, slightly swollen eyes, and a flustered demeanor, she appeared even more charming. She sat down beside Mrs. Wang and gently held her hand: "Please tell me, who thought of participating in this program?"

The embrace in front of the crowd moments ago did not make her feel uncomfortable, yet now, the unavoidable closeness suddenly caused her to blush. Outside the glass window was a dark tunnel, brightly reflecting their figures; among the indistinct faces of the passengers, only they appeared clear, as if gazing at their own reflections in the water.

She slightly turned her face, intently watching the two figures, carefully discerning the distorted tones of the guests' conversation, and occasionally jotting down snippets of dialogue on the notepaper beside her

The young girl seemed not to have heard his words, her gaze directed across the street, her eyes curved in a smile. She turned her head and said: "Thank you, but no need. My friend is waiting for me. Mr. Li, goodbye"

The young man accused his wife: "Have you been taking care of the child seriously? If it weren't for you, how could he suddenly have contracted pneumonia?"

Su Ruhao extended his hand, gently stroking her back, patiently waiting for her to finish speaking, and smiled as he said: "I will wait for you"

What is going on with this program? How can they publicly expose such wounds like this

Su Ruhao's hand repeatedly brushed over her long hair, his fingers gently gliding through the flowing strands, bringing warmth, as if urging her to believe that this was the right thing to do. Xia Huixi felt her chaotic thoughts gradually settling down, like a cat comforted by its owner, unable to resist curling up like this, basking in the sun, completely still

Li Haifeng's tone was very sincere: "No, but you are indeed the most suitable candidate"

Xia Huixi was unsure whether this could be considered a form of stubbornness. Perhaps it was because her experience with recording television programs had not left her with a good impression, and she indeed felt a certain fear towards exposure. Thus, she responded with a smile, yet did not relent in the slightest.

Xia Huixi only remembered a statement made by the old professor at the closing ceremony of the conference—some people, after realizing their sins, are able to live well.

An expected attitude. Xia Huixi was unsure whether she should speak up to explain, when a staff member shouted from a distance: "Today's tape ... ... "

This couple had a child just six months ago. However, in the months following the birth, the child succumbed to an acute pneumonia, compounded by complications, and unfortunately passed away despite medical efforts. This blow was unbearable for the young parents, and during a heated argument, Mr. Wang could not help but reveal a secret he had long kept hidden in his heart

Li Haifeng seemed unable to anticipate her response, momentarily at a loss for words. After taking a few sips of water, he spoke again: "Miss Xia is fully aware of how this organization currently operates. Without publicity, it is hard to imagine that our group could continue to sponsor indefinitely. Although it is referred to as endorsement, it is not actually a commercial activity. You only need to cooperate by taking some promotional photos and participating in some events. The first reason is that your program has a high viewership and the audience's response has been quite positive; the second reason is that you are engaged in the field of psychology, which greatly benefits the overall image of the charity organization. If there are promotional activities, that in itself is a selling point. What do you think?"

The subway arrived at a station, and Xia Huixi remembered that his home was nearby. He tilted his head and asked him: "You can get off first. The place I need to go is not far, just at the next station."

Su Ruhao suddenly sighed, remaining silent as he extended his arms to embrace her. She could also feel the warm breath beside him, a softness that made it hard to let go. It was the first time he had done this in public, and he lowered his head to kiss her ear, his voice carrying warmth to her heart: "You know very well that doing this will lead others to misunderstand you... why are you so foolish?"

After finishing her class, no matter how late it was, as long as he was also at the school that day, he would always stand under the large camphor tree in front of the teaching building, see her, and smile as he said: "I will wait for you to have dinner together and discuss a few questions."

However, her expression was evidently somewhat uncertain, resembling a frightened fawn, with glistening eyes and a hint of worry: "I don't know if what I'm doing is going too far... or if it will..."

The director simply paused the program. Xia Huixi walked alone to the backstage to rest and heard someone outside saying: "That woman is really pitiful; she just fainted and was sent for emergency treatment."

The subway travels at great speed, as it is not peak hours, and there are few people, making the carriages feel light and dizzying. Xia Huixi leans against the plastic chair back, resting with her eyes closed, as life returns to its original appearance overnight. Attending classes, walking, catching trains, and studying quietly late at night. Such a repetitive cycle is not without its merits.

The light streamed in from the frosted glass outside the hall, and the entire room seemed like a small cocoon, enveloped in a layer of translucent white brightness that gave one a faint sense of being in some ethereal realm. Xia Huixi lowered her gaze, her eyes resting on her wrist, while Mrs. Wang gently shook her hand, as if trying to conceal something. However, since it was being held, she could not break free and could only gently turn her wrist over.

So many subtle "waiting for you" moments, at this moment, gather like fine streams, nourishing the softest part of her heart. She instinctively took his hand, looked into his eyes, and cheerfully said: "I haven't eaten yet"

I was thinking of Professor Jung's words. She murmured as if reciting, "One should not use false beliefs to save others... Everyone has their own destiny; we are not gods, merely bystanders..."

... ...

Charitable organizations need representatives, and I do not oppose this; it may gain more understanding and attention from the public. However, I am just an ordinary person, and it seems that I would not have much effect. " Xia Huixi pondered for a moment, "Moreover, with you taking the lead in this matter, it makes me feel even more that this is a commercial act. I do not think this is a good suggestion.

The words "waiting for you" have, in his memory, been spoken to her countless times

You know, our charity organization was just established not long ago, and everything is still being standardized, including the naming, the organization's logo, and the scale, which are all in the process of confirmation. We believe it is necessary to find a spokesperson. During the meeting yesterday, everyone recommended you.

The voice of the director has already come through the earpiece: "Xia, the pace is a bit too fast; we need to consider the host and the audience outside. Can you slow it down a bit?"

Did you forget? Su Ruhao pressed his lips together, his gaze gentle, "Last time you took me to see the live show, I even greeted the program's director. I suppose I am... your colleague now."

He fell silent, then said with a light laugh: "No. I will accompany you."

The host had to interrupt them. However, at that moment, Xia Huixi suddenly stood up and calmly said, "May I go in and have a conversation with the two guests?"

On the second day, when she went to class, she felt extremely fatigued, and no amount of concealer could hide the dark circles under her eyes. Xia Huixi stood on the podium, greeted the students, and suddenly realized that the prepared lesson was exceedingly dull. Perhaps before the students grew impatient, she herself could no longer continue with the lecture. After pondering for a few seconds, she made a spontaneous decision to casually discuss the recent academic exchange.

Not paying attention to the fact that the sidewalk was actually at a nearby intersection, Xia Huixi saw that there were no vehicles on the road, so she quickly ran over. When she reached him, her breath was a bit hurried due to the cold air she had inhaled. After calming down for a moment, she smiled and said: "Why are you still here?"

"What kind of strap? How can such a program be broadcasted?" The director's voice seemed to be a low growl, filled with anger. Xia Huixi was taken aback, said nothing, and without even removing her makeup, gathered her things and walked out.

If you continue to remain silent, does that mean you acknowledge what I said, that you bear considerable responsibility for your child's death

Li Haifeng was clearly unaware that she knew Pei Yueze. After a moment of slight astonishment, he decided to put an end to the topic: "Miss Xia, let's not discuss this for now, as it has taken up your time. You can think it over when you return, alright?"

Do you need me to turn off the microphone

Her heart suddenly skipped a beat, and her fists clenched uncontrollably. In the mirror, her face was pale, which made her blush appear even more charming and alluring. It was as if amidst the snow-like pear blossoms, pink peach petals were suddenly drifting down in the wind.

She also breathed a sigh of relief and provided each other with a way out: "Alright, I will consider it"

Mrs. Wang quickly glanced at her, her gaze flickering slightly, as if she wanted to say something but hesitated, ultimately nodding her head.

The outdoor clamor had nothing to do with Xia Huixi. She merely furrowed her brow slightly, removed the microphone she had been holding, and placed a small note in Mrs. Wang's palm: "This is my contact information. If you need anything, you can reach out to me at any time." As she spoke, she glanced up at her husband, the tall man whose gaze seemed somewhat dazed, fixated on a certain point, seemingly oblivious to the outside world. Xia Huixi could tell that he loved his wife, yet having come to this point, was it also a twist of fate?

His wife, on the other hand, was weeping uncontrollably, and the sound transmitted through the microphone carried an unbearable sense of oppression

The students were very interested in the prominent figures in psychology attending the conference. As the bustling class came to an end, Xia Huixi, carrying her bag, received a call from the head of a psychological assistance organization as she was leaving. She was somewhat surprised, but since she was in a hurry to get to the television station, she did not say much, only scheduled a time and hurriedly ended the call.

In fact, when that couple first began their conversation, she had already noticed something amiss. The wife did not refute her husband's questions very much; perhaps this reaction only served to further infuriate him, causing him to erupt in rage. She carefully observed the woman's mindset and compared it to those weak and powerless responses, almost instantly daring to speculate whether she was using the opportunity of the program to vent her psychological pressure and guilt. And was she subconsciously hiding something?

How does one speak

However, the last sentence spoken by Xia Huixi brought silence to the entire venue

She smiled slightly and said, "Yes."

When leaving, Li Haifeng gentlemanly held the door for her and asked, "Miss Xia, where do you live? May I escort you?"

Even from the perspective of an ordinary person, this is an extremely harsh accusation that lacks an objective factual basis. In the audience, there was an uproar. Through the glass, the profile of the woman who had just lost her child appeared very frail, even trembling. Many audience members began to whisper to each other, likely expressing their dissatisfaction with the psychologist, and the noise grew increasingly chaotic.

During the early stages of his wife's pregnancy, he discovered that she was exchanging ambiguous text messages with her first love. At such a moment of profound upheaval in the family, he naturally found this situation unbearable. They blamed each other, engaged in endless arguments, and the entire family was on the verge of collapse

After a long while, that voice hesitated somewhat, but still replied: "Yes."

Su Ruhao's gaze contained a hint of a smile as he slowly released her, then took her hand again: "Where are you going? If I had known earlier, I would have driven here."

Her tone seemed somewhat sulky as she shook her head

She thought for a moment and then agreed

Xia Huixi's eyes resembled a fine piece of amber, soft yet refreshing. In such a gaze, there was no malice, no questioning, and no offense. She continued to ask the question: "So Mr. Wang said that you are in contact with your previous lover, is that correct?"

He leaned against the velvet sofa and nodded slightly: "I suppose it can be considered a form of assistance, though I am unsure if Miss Xia has any interest."

She remained silent, and Mr. Wang appeared somewhat irritated, simply stating: "It is not me"

The child fell ill due to catching a cold. You are a full-time housewife and have also hired a part-time worker to help take care of the child. Do you think the child's illness is related to your husband blaming you for not taking proper care of him

The crowd waiting for the train was as numerous as the crashing waves against the shore, and they hardly needed to move, almost being pushed into the carriage by the throng behind them. However, Su Ruhao held onto her hand firmly, never letting go. As Xia Huixi tried to avoid the body of a young man beside her, he subtly shifted his position, enclosing her in the small space in front of him. His hand inevitably settled at her waist, and he softly said, "I’m sorry." As Xia Huixi tried to avoid the body of a young man beside her, he subtly shifted his position, enclosing her in the small space in front of him. His hand inevitably settled at her waist, and he softly said, "I’m sorry."

She was listening with great interest until she heard the words "endorsement"; suddenly, she couldn't help but laugh: "Mr. Li, you aren't joking, are you? Endorsement? Do you think I am a celebrity?"

Su Ruhao did not drive here; they walked together towards the subway station. He suddenly said, "Why did you do that in the program just now?"

They are a young couple with the surname Wang. They are seated in a small room separated by frosted glass, where the audience and the host can only see faintly swaying, blurred shadows. The sound has also been specially processed, making it impossible to discern their true voices.

Such words, such a tone, are filled with tenderness, causing her eyes to slightly warm with emotion

Perhaps sensing the hands pressed against her back, Su Ruhao held her a little tighter and said softly: "This job, if it is not to be done, then so be it. Let it be a misunderstanding; it is nothing to worry about."

She knew that she no longer needed to say anything, nor did she have to think about explaining; she simply reached out her hand quietly and wrapped it around his waist

They seem to be nothing more than ordinary young men and women, holding hands as they seek the most tranquil and warm lights. Behind them, the entire city, at this moment, is shrouded in mist due to the damp autumn rain.

Liu Fei was taken aback, as this was indeed not in line with Xia Huixi's usual demeanor. She had always preferred to sit quietly in a corner, seemingly believing that the fewer words spoken, the better, and had never taken the initiative to make requests. The director called for a "cut," and after a brief discussion, the camera switched to Xia Huixi, who was slowly walking into the small room. Because she was wearing a microphone, the audience clearly heard her voice, which came through very softly: "Madam, I have a few questions that I hope to clarify."

When attending conferences abroad, she sometimes walks slowly, her gaze wandering in the fresh world around her. Only he, with a calm demeanor, notices this, and thus he always slows his pace, turning back to call out to her from a short distance: "Hurry up, we are waiting for you."

As the conversation progressed, Xia Huixi's speech became increasingly rapid. Meanwhile, the voice of the director came through the earpiece, growing more and more severe: "Xiao Xia, that's enough." Around the same time, the host also received instructions in her earpiece, and Liu Fei's voice interjected, tinged with a sense of panic and confusion: "Hehe... What do the audience on site think?"

This episode seems to be different from the cases that Xia Huixi has encountered in this program in the past

She wearily closed her eyes, leaning on his shoulder, and thought lightly, yes, let the misunderstanding be. As long as one is guiltless in their heart, what else is there to worry about?

Until the end, she simply took out her phone: "This matter, I can directly ask Mr. Pei. If he also thinks I am not suitable to endorse this public welfare event, can you reconsider the candidates then?"

She saw the director walk in with a very poor expression, and in a tone that seemed somewhat restrained, said: "There is nothing more for today. Let's end the recording of the program here"

To everyone's surprise, this time, Mrs. Wang nodded slightly, a gesture small enough yet sufficient for the audience present to clearly see her stance

It is Li Haifeng, whom I met before, and he is also the head of the charitable organization for psychological assistance, CRIX. When Xia Huixi saw him from a distance, her heart skipped a beat, and she almost thought that something was about to happen again

He turned around, the sunlight casting a glow on half of his profile. His eyes were bright and deep, as if he had taken a moment to appraise her from head to toe, and the corners of his lips curled slightly: "I'll wait for you to return to school together"

Upon exiting the department, he stood at the door chatting with the security guard. Turning his head, he saw her and stepped outside. She asked him, "Didn’t you leave earlier?" He replied calmly, "I was waiting for you to leave together."

Until something in her mind reminded her that she seemed to have forgotten something. When she finally remembered, Xia Huixi almost jumped up: "I have an appointment!"

In a moment, Xia Huixi completely forgot how to organize her sentences, her mind repeatedly echoing his words, ruminating over them again and again—indeed, what was she thinking at the very moment she stood up?

In the afternoon, the sunlight dispelled the light autumn rain, and the pedestrians folded their umbrellas, their steps appearing somewhat more leisurely. Xia Huixi noticed a man standing in the nearby square, dressed in a casual off-white suit, his figure standing tall and straight like a slender white poplar, with his back turned towards her.

He took a large step from the side, blocking her path. His tone was slightly cool, but his gaze was filled with compassion: "You still haven't told me what you were really thinking during the recording just now"

Xia Huixi seemed not to have heard, her gaze still fixed on Mrs. Wang, smiling as she reminded her: "Mrs. Wang?"

"There are marks of self-harm on her wrist; I think she has attempted suicide before, and perhaps she will try to do so again in the future... I can't help but want to try, to see if this might save her..."

Thus, she unhesitatingly and sharply raised her doubts in front of everyone

This potent remedy may either be a miraculous elixir or a bone-chilling poison, and at this moment, she truly has no confidence in it

It was actually a decision made in an instant. After getting off the plane yesterday, I walked to the hair salon at the school gate and suddenly stopped, deciding to trim my somewhat long hair. The familiar hairdresser noticed the scar on my forehead that had not yet healed and suggested, "How about I give you bangs? It will conveniently cover that wound."

This was their first meeting after returning to the country. Due to the events of the afternoon, Xia Huixi's mind was still somewhat hazy as she walked alongside him, unsure of what to say.

His voice was calm and carried a sense of unhurried persistence, and Xia Huixi no longer insisted on continuing. The usual annoyance of squeezing into the bus seemed to be infused with a different sentiment, as if a piece of candy had been held between her lips, subtly releasing a hint of sweetness.

"Is that so?" Xia Huixi lowered her head again, not paying much attention, as the strands of hair in front of her forehead fell at the corners of her eyes and brows, causing a slight itch.

Finally, sitting in the studio, Liu Fei saw her, gave a reluctant greeting, then turned her head away and stopped speaking. She had only hurriedly glanced at the general content of this episode while sitting on the subway, and now there was not much time left for her. Xia Huixi simply put down the script, adjusted her clothes, and sat there waiting for the guests to appear

Xia Huixi stared blankly, raising her eyebrows and looking at him, exclaiming, "How could you be there?"

Li Haifeng stood up, smiling warmly as he shook hands with her. After sitting down, he began to make small talk: "Miss Xia, what have you been busy with lately?"

I have reviewed your materials and have a general understanding of the situation. I have also been wanting to ask, though I am unsure if you would mind this question, which pertains to the baby who was stillborn

Liu Fei's interview skills are undoubtedly proficient, as she succinctly conveyed the general situation in just a few words

Xia Huixi tentatively posed several brutally honest questions in front of the audience, and the reactions from the other party increasingly validated her suspicions. Perhaps, as her husband said, she regretted having brought this child into the world, and her decision to come on the show was perhaps a quest for redemption, or perhaps a search for destruction

They met at a coffee shop. Since it was related to a psychological assistance organization, Xia Huixi felt that it was fine to go in with Su Ruhao. However, he only accompanied her to the door and then said, "Perhaps finding you is a very important matter. Since there is no appointment with anyone else, it is better for you to go in by yourself." He waved to her, "Hurry in, or you will be late."

I think your child has unfortunately passed away, and you have come to this program again, perhaps for some reason, to alleviate your psychological burden? As for the reason, as your husband mentioned, it may be related to your previous partner, but I dare not speculate on that. What do you think?

This hairstyle, once cut, indeed appears much more youthful, reminiscent of those street girls wearing glossy black contact lenses and holding cameras for selfies. However, now that it has come to this, she merely brushed aside the hair on her forehead and accepted it with composure

No one spoke, and even the audience sitting outside could hear the woman's heavy breathing

Xia Huixi held the cup of lemonade and paused: "I just returned from a meeting, and I haven't been busy with much, just attending classes. Do you need help with the psychological support activities?"