Chapter 5, Where Does the Joy Come From

The teacher is not happy: "You should now think about how to better accomplish what you are capable of. When going abroad, you must act within your means. Our decision is reasonable."

In the midst of a lively conversation, a phone call suddenly came in from a teacher at the Foreign Affairs Office: "Is this Lu Qingye? Can you come to the office for a moment now?"

That afternoon was very pleasant. I did not expect Mrs. Kuang to be able to prepare such delicious dishes. When a full bowl of braised pork with tofu knots was served, I almost wanted to cheer.

Later, a heavy rain began to fall. It coincided with the lively Obon Festival in Japan. While the crowd sought shelter from the rain, she was overjoyed, rushing into the downpour with her arms wide open. The colorful ribbons tied to the bamboo branches at every household's entrance were completely soaked by the rain, and the dance troupe, which had just been as bustling and surging as the tide, had crowded and dispersed. At that moment, I went out with her, and she turned back with a smile, saying: "Come on!"

I made a sound of acknowledgment. She merely sighed and did not say anything further

At the banquet, my mother sat between my aunt and me, while my father was seated far away—my parents are divorced, and it is quite awkward for them to attend a family gathering together. Fortunately, everyone had other topics to discuss, and after a few rounds of drinks, the mood remained lively.

Alright, don't think about it anymore. Today, our school is hosting a Japanese language teacher exchange meeting, let's go and take a look together

He hesitated and stood still: "I am not going."

I suppressed my anxiety and excitement as I knocked on the door of the Foreign Affairs Office.

"As long as there is meat to eat, he is referred to as Professor." He laughed, "Look at this student, truly outrageous."

I can earn money on my own, so you can rest assured. I comforted myself, knowing that I must be an adult

I thought I had already put in a great deal of effort

She said, "In this society, mere ability is far from sufficient"

But she resolutely did not stay, severing all ties with you

After eating the mooncakes, we each returned home

"You are very different from your father," she said, picking a few branches of blooming osmanthus to pause the conversation. "Come, talk with them; the time we have to gather together is limited."

I was in a daze when I happened to receive her call, her voice sounding very close: "Is this Ximing? I've been waiting for you for a long time"

Speak up

She kept holding my hand: "Very good, but it will be quite expensive, right"

Lu Qingye

Hmm, but that seems to be a bundle of white irises, so beautiful. " Gui Xin squinted and said, "Ha, there are also four boxes of exquisite roasted duck

"Lu Qingye, please take a seat," the teacher smiled. "The exam results have been released, and you have performed excellently. You can choose any university. However, based on the information we have gathered, we are somewhat concerned about your family's financial situation."

I hate it, if it weren't for needing to take this bouquet of white irises: "I would come right now"

He continued: "There is another matter that I cannot bypass."

Song Ximing

Gui Xin smiled and said, "You are too hard on yourself"

The descendants live in harmony, a truly joyful scene

Father spoke emphatically: "Rest assured, within a year, Ximing will also start a family"

The letter also included several landscape photos. Teacher Nishikawa transferred from Tsukuba University to Shizuoka University, and Jiu Xun followed him to Shizuoka. In Japan, it is almost unimaginable for students like Jiu Xun, who come from a language background, to remain in academia. Although she obtained a doctor's degree, like Nishikawa, she needs to hustle between several language schools to make a living

I feel very at ease. Next, I will inform her of the results of the exchange student selection examination

I first met her at the international student gathering at Tsukuba University. I cannot recall what she was wearing at that time, but I distinctly remember her apricot-like eyes, her loud laughter, and her long straight hair that reached down to her waist

However, there were only a few people in the auditorium. A student, seeing me with my large and small bags as if I were an alien, asked, "Who are you looking for?"

The happiest person is grandmother: "Is that so? Could it be that there is already a candidate? You must bring them back for grandmother to see"

Kang Mingyuan said: "I did not read as many books as my elder brother, which is why I married early"

What belongs to me, I am unwilling to give up

I asked him: "Is there anything you still cannot let go of"

The exchange meeting in the auditorium over there has already begun, and I said loudly: "You are not Song Ximing; the Song Ximing I first knew was as proud as a swan. Now you are both dejected and disordered, even I can see that."

I will not work at your company. I cannot think of a better reason, my matters allow me to choose for myself, is that acceptable

Father returned from Tokyo, and the family gathered once again, leaving me behind. It is said that he was very successful in this business deal. He is waiting for me to bow my head. It seems that everyone is waiting for me to bow my head.

My posture was one of refusal, but at that moment, a tall male student approached and politely said, "Your translation indeed helped a lot; there is no need for Teacher Kuang to treat, I will take care of this meal."

I have long sought her, for she has borne my child

It seems there is no time left. "Forget it," she chuckled, "I will come back again in the future."

The results of the exchange student selection examination have been released. I went to the Foreign Affairs Office to check the results, and I ranked third

The teacher stated directly: "After comprehensive consideration, we have decided to allocate your spot to a more suitable candidate"

I choked. She was right.

Such a family gathering is a significant event in my home. Moreover, my uncle from Tennessee has just returned, and my third uncle's daughter is about to get married. One can imagine the lively atmosphere of this gathering

I laughed: "What about these things? Are they a gift for me?"

I went to find Guixin: "The exchange student quota has been given to someone else"

I backed out on my own, and my mother asked, "Did you have a quarrel?"

The boss recommended the white iris. That bouquet was wrapped very neatly

This is truly good news. The weekend has arrived, and I have purchased a ticket to go home to visit my parents. My father's condition is better than I had imagined; he seems to have gained a little weight. I asked him how he was doing and if anyone was bullying him, speaking in a tone akin to that of a parent asking a child. My father smiled and reassured me to not worry.

He smiled and said, "Last time I mentioned that I would treat you to a meal"

I walked hand in hand with Gui Xin to the auditorium, where the unique cool breeze of autumn in Shanghai carried the scent of the last season's withering oleander. We had our meal at the school's fast food restaurant, and a cup of hot milk successfully calmed me down. I sighed and said, "I realize that many times I am just being stubborn with myself. For instance, in this exchange student selection, it seems I am testing my own limits to see if I can do it."

I always feel that there is never enough time. Every day, lying in bed feels like a waste of time, and I am extremely anxious about it

I saw the girl jump out in surprise, pointing at me and exclaiming, "What are you doing here?"

She still has a merciless tongue: "I am indeed jealous of someone like you. While I am troubled about living expenses and tuition fees to the point of losing my hair, you have the audacity to fly all the way here to visit an old flame. I once thought you were so composed"

That day, I slept in the attic room with my mother. The weather suddenly turned cool, and coinciding with my menstrual period, I felt a slight cramping in my abdomen, which was alleviated by pressing a hot water bottle against it. My feet rested against the bed railing, reminiscent of my youthful days. The night was crystal clear, and the fragrance of osmanthus was almost overwhelming.

I went to the translation association to submit my work. On the way back, the city was as lively as ever. At the subway station, couples were kissing, and in the underground passage, there were beggars bowing. In college, there was a classmate in the dormitory who loved to play the guitar. Whenever he felt inspired, he would take his girlfriend to the subway station to play passionately, completely lost in the moment, with a hat placed in front of him. They sang and played, and passersby would toss a few coins or small bills their way, which they gladly accepted. After finishing, they would swagger off to KFC with their small change. How young we were back then, never lacking in enthusiasm, as if the world could disappear and we still had plenty of youth to squander. They sang and played, and passersby would toss a few coins or small bills their way, which they gladly accepted. After finishing, they would swagger off to KFC with their small change. How young we were back then, never lacking in enthusiasm, as if the world could disappear and we still had plenty of youth to squander.

She enjoys eating square cakes, almonds, hazelnuts, and roasted duck. I was wandering around, carefully selecting a few boxes of pastries.

Song Ximing

He looked at me calmly and said, "Is there a reason?"

I suddenly gained freedom, yet it feels as though I have lost everything. My father did not take me to Tokyo, nor did he contact me. I began searching for a job. The situation is not optimistic; in fact, several companies declined my application as soon as they heard my name. I suspect that my father may have intervened.

My uncle's daughter, my cousin Yuming, who is about to get married, also acted spoiled: "Grandma won't give me anything—"

His expression was dim. Gui Xin assessed the situation and chose to avoid it. He struggled to speak: "I lost my job and can do nothing. I am also unwilling to bow my head and admit my mistakes. No, I do not believe I am at fault."

It was originally just a joke, but he nodded very seriously and said, "This is a very good choice, I give it to you." Both Gui Xin and I were taken aback.

Aunt called: "Ximing, tomorrow is the Mid-Autumn Festival, we will have dinner at grandpa and grandma's house in the evening"

The next day at the gathering, the moon was beautiful, and my aunt personally prepared many dishes. We chatted in the living room. My uncle's voice was as loud as ever, and he began with: "We in America—"

You can go wherever you want. Mother looks much thinner, "Don't worry about the house." Then, feeling at a loss, she said, "But..."

It is a slender figure, holding a full hand of items, looking around left and right. Ironically, he is also holding a large bouquet of white flowers

I suddenly feel a pang of sorrow. Looking up at this man, he once held my hand and ran with me on the hillside outside the Sacré-Cœur Basilica. On the way back, he also comforted me, saying, "Everything will be alright." He told me, "Everything you gain is not unexpected, because you work hard." It is this very man who, at this moment, appears so fragile.

Where are you

"No, you cannot." He was very certain, "Remember, I just want to help you avoid unnecessary detours."

Regardless of his anger or surprise, I responded firmly: "This is my own business."

I ask: "How are you doing there"

I insisted, saying: "Exchange students do not need to pay additional tuition fees; I can earn my own living expenses while abroad"

After dinner, Uncle said: "Why not let Ximing develop abroad?"

That person turned around and stopped a classmate to ask something. At that moment, I happened to look up, and in the blink of an eye, I was astonished: "Heavens, I know this person."

I still feel lost: "I originally thought I was qualified enough to deserve it"

She sat there, slightly tilting her head, holding a book in her arms, occasionally turning a couple of pages. From time to time, she would take a small box of balm, twist it open, use her little finger to pick a bit, and gently apply it to her wrist

Yes, it just ended less than half an hour ago

Father also has a phone: "Tomorrow your nephews and nieces will be here, act a bit like an uncle." My second uncle's son, my cousin Song Kangming, married a Chinese-American wife and has a pair of children, which is very fulfilling

Uncle Er said: "Ximing, hurry up, your parents are looking forward to holding their grandson"

I told my father: "I will not go to Tokyo with you"

On that day, I received her call: "I have arrived in Beijing, at BLCU. Can you come now?" She also said, "There is a last-minute arrangement to go to Shanghai this afternoon, so time is likely to be tight"

That day I wore a low-neckline sweater, underneath which I had a black camisole. My fabric pants were slightly sagging due to being too loose at the waist, and my canvas shoes were quite old. This was a popular outfit among college girls. I nodded gracefully.

She squinted her cat-like eyes and pouted, "My school is right next door. However, isn't Chen Jiuxun in Japan? — Oh, I see now." She was very happy, "I also want to attend that exchange meeting; can you introduce me to her?"

She regretted: "We are already on our way to the airport"

The Kangming couple, along with their children, enjoyed the company of their grandparents. The younger sibling behaved appropriately and was well-liked by the elders. The grandmother reached out and gave her a jade bracelet from her wrist. The second uncle, pleased, remarked: "This bracelet was originally intended to be passed down only to the eldest grandson's wife"

Hearing the adults talking, I went to the balcony to get some fresh air. Suddenly, I heard my grandmother say: "Why is Ximing here?"

He tightly closed his eyes, his complexion as desolate as a mountain covered in white snow: "Do you think I am guilty?"

The outcome has already been determined. The teacher's face resembled a sinking iron block, "This is the first time I have seen a student who is so unaware of the gravity of the situation."

Professor Kuang! I admire you, you are truly fortunate

The man bowed his head in silence before me. I felt a twinge of sympathy: "Hey, don't be discouraged. If I were you, I would do the same."

Grandmother replied with a warm smile, "Because Jiani's jade is suitable, it is a matter of fate." Kangming's wife is named Pei Jiani. She also said, "I am not being biased; I have kept the bracelet for Ximing's wife. When Yuming gets married, grandmother will also have a gift for her"

Even though there were various unpleasant experiences later on, I still wished to see her. The time after our separation felt as long as half a lifetime. I stood behind the door of the auditorium where she was having a meeting, longing to see her immediately

I used a small porcelain spoon to scoop the sauce of the braised pork over the white rice, and Mrs. Kuang smiled, saying, "Just lift it up and pour it directly." I did not hesitate and followed her advice. Mrs. Kuang added, "We all enjoy eating it this way."

I am very willing

In addition, a bouquet is being prepared. She loves flowers and all fragrant plants. I told the florist that I wanted white, large, and very fragrant ones

I looked at him

I almost asked, is Nishikawa coming too

The remuneration from translation work has become my sole source of income. My mother was exasperated: "Stubborn!"

We are still young, and we should be at ease. " She said, suddenly patting me, "Hey, look over there—"

I still have not found a job

Father smiled: "He is currently at my company, how could I bear to let him go out? We will go to Tokyo together for business next week"

When I received Jiu Xun's email, Beijing had officially entered deep autumn. The letter mentioned that she would be coming to Beijing for a meeting and asked if it would be convenient for me to meet.

Thus, I replied calmly: You are always welcome, see you in Beijing

It was in the teaching building that I saw Kuang Duxing again, and surprisingly, he was the one to greet me first: "Lu Qingye, is class over?"

Your school has many beautiful girls, and there are often such fools, right

Kuang Duxing introduces: "This is Zhou Zhi, a second-year graduate student, and he is your senior. He is the one working on this topic this time." He also said, "There isn't much good food around here, let's go to my house."

It is truly strange; I have been captivated by her since that time

I was carrying a box of snacks and a package of roasted duck, and I also had a large bouquet of white irises in my arms. The taxi driver said, "Oh, where are you headed?" I smiled and replied, "Visiting my teacher." The guy said, "You are truly filial."

The sanatorium is enveloped in the sweet fragrance of osmanthus flowers. Outside the room where my mother resides, silver osmanthus blooms abundantly, with pure white stamens. Somewhere, the delicate sound of wind chimes can be heard, and time flows as if filtered through clarity and brightness. I took her back to Luqiao Town; it was already late, and fishing boats were moored in the river, their soft yellow lights casting reflections on the water's surface. This scene feels unreal, as if it were a dream, with occasional groves, villages, and churches along the shore. Luqiao Town is right before us. This scene feels unreal, as if it were a dream, with occasional groves, villages, and churches along the shore. Luqiao Town is right before us.

After that smile, she and I had already embarked on completely different paths in life

I bow my head. My grandmother makes me feel ashamed

I came to see Chen Jiuxun. "Trying to calm myself down, I asked, 'What are you doing here as well?'"

She laughed heartily: "If you want to give, then give; there will be plenty of opportunities in the future"

Lu Qingye

Am I correct in asking whether the foreign language teacher exchange group from Japan is not meeting here

She picked up the flower scissors to cut the osmanthus flowers, her smile serene. I smiled back. She said, "Do not push yourself too hard; Grandma has noticed you have lost weight." The elder's gaze was clear and calm, "You must believe in yourself; one should never turn back or give up easily. If there are doubts and confusion in your heart that cannot be dispelled, then do not dwell on them, but continue to act according to your original intentions."

And she unexpectedly cried bitterly in the rain, leaving me at a loss. The rainwater on the ground flowed into the storm drain, as if an invisible pair of hands were secretly gathering it. Before her tears had dried, she went to Carrefour to buy discounted salmon sushi, sitting in the dusk after the rain had just cleared to eat.