Chapter 6, Past One

I could no longer hear Yu'er’s voice, and slowly crouched down, knowing that I was just shedding tears. I was completely unaware of when Yi had walked in front of me. It was only when he also crouched down, and that familiar yet unfamiliar face met my gaze, that I looked over with tear-filled eyes. Yi cupped my face and wiped my tears, saying: "Zi Qi, you must not cry anymore"

Juanzi comforted me: "You should go out and have fun with your classmates more often, don't stay cooped up alone. You'll get used to it gradually and it will be fine."

My roommate often exclaims: "Those suffering from drought die of thirst, while those afflicted by floods perish in water; Ziqi is unaware of the hardships of the world"

As soon as I got into the car, without waiting to fasten my seatbelt, he stepped on the gas and the car sped away. We did not speak along the way; I secretly glanced at him, his lips tightly sealed, resembling an iceberg. The speed of the car frightened me. When we drove into the underground parking lot, I got out of the car feeling anxious. I had an impulse to run away, but he came over and took my hand to the elevator. His grip was so strong that I felt a sharp pain in my wrist, and I felt wronged inside, holding back tears that I dared not let fall. As soon as we entered the room, my feet suddenly left the ground, and in the next moment, I was thrown onto the bed. Before I could react, I had already received several slaps on my backside. His grip was truly strong; I felt a sharp pain in my wrist again, and I felt wronged inside, holding back tears that I dared not let fall. As soon as we entered the room, my feet suddenly left the ground, and in the next moment, I was thrown onto the bed. Before I could react, I had already received several slaps on my backside. I burst into tears. Yi shouted at me: "Dare to cry! Is this how you repay my trust with lies? Look at how you are dressed today; do you think my words go in one ear and out the other?" With that, he gave me two more slaps.

I arrived in Beijing to attend university with excitement, while Yi went abroad to study. During the first Mid-Autumn Festival in Beijing, the school distributed two mooncakes, and I wrote to him, saving one for him. The first time I saw the red leaves at Fragrant Hills, I wrote to tell him that I got lost, and the red leaves were so far away from me that I couldn't pick a single one. The first snowfall arrived silently, and I told him in my letter that I walked alone from the ancient city to Xidan, with still a long way to go waiting for him to return and accompany me. During my first internship at a company, I wrote to tell him that I was scolded to tears, as I couldn't even design the simplest CI.

I said to Juanzi with distress: "There are boys inviting me to dinner, watching movies, studying together, and going out to have fun, but just the thought of them being my boyfriends gives me goosebumps."

A dispute dissipates into nothingness

Yi did not deny it, he said: "As long as you know, it's fine. If I don't take good care of you, do you really think it's just a romance on paper?" Then he lowered his voice gently: "I am so far away from you, I truly miss you, which is why I want to know everything about you. Don't cry like a little puppy again."

At that time, I did not realize that this was merely the beginning, the beginning of his intense possessiveness. I was simply soft-hearted then. If I were in his place, I too would want to know every little detail about him.

I had no idea that a web had been woven around me as soon as Yi returned. Until one day, a male classmate invited me to a karaoke party for his birthday.

Yi does not allow me to let down my curly hair; I always braid it when I see him. Yi also does not permit me to wear makeup and dislikes seeing me in short skirts during winter. However, on this day, all the girls in the dormitory were eager to dress up before going out, claiming it was to showcase the charm of Room 613. Therefore, I not only let my hair down, wore Indian-style earrings, but also donned a leather mini skirt and applied makeup. I felt quite good about my appearance, and my roommates said I looked beautiful, so I happily stepped out.

When Yi called me, I was happily eating. Yi asked me: "Who are you with?"

I do not doubt his love for me or my feelings for him. It is just that he is increasingly indulgent towards me, to the point where I feel overwhelmed. I dare not speak of it, and the part of me that has never been sufficiently docile has unconsciously begun to act in opposition to him.

I casually said: "With classmates, celebrating a classmate's birthday, having a meal and singing karaoke together"

Sometimes I suddenly call Juanzi nervously and say: "I can't remember what Yi looks like, I can't remember his voice, am I dreaming, does such a person even exist?"

During those six years, I truly experienced what it means to yearn for someone day and night. In the morning when I woke up, I would suddenly think of him, and at night I would dream of scenes where he and I were playing by the small river in the town. Sometimes it would be a nightmare, where I would be searching for him everywhere, constantly looking for him. Upon waking from the dream, I would cry, feeling an extraordinary sadness

He gently coaxed me

Yi then asked me: "How are you dressed today? Tell me about it, so I can imagine what my Ziqi looks like."

I stared at him blankly and said loudly, "Are you having someone follow me?"

Yi particularly dotes on me; not only does he buy what I want to eat, but he also brings along whatever my dormitory classmates enjoy whenever he comes to school. For this, I often praise his attentiveness. Yi smiles and says, "I have always wanted to take care of you, but I never had the chance. If I treat them well, they will also treat you well. I cannot bear to let my Ziqi suffer even the slightest grievance."

I want to laugh, but I continue to cry, staring at him with tear-filled eyes, helplessly saying: "I look just like a little dog, don't I?" After saying this, his warm lips fell on my eyes and then on my mouth. He pulled me into his embrace, resting his chin on my head. When did he grow so tall? When did he become so mature and handsome? Is it his heartbeat or mine? My thoughts were in disarray when I heard a muffled voice above me, Yi softly said: "I am back, I am back." He pulled me into his embrace, resting his chin on my head. When did he grow so tall? When did he become so mature and handsome? Is it his heartbeat or mine? My thoughts were in disarray when I heard a muffled voice above me, Yi softly said: "I am back, I am back."

The sweet words of a lover are the most intoxicating. Getting lost in them makes everything else fade away. I am immersed in the joy of having Yi back by my side. I only know how sweet the days spent together with him are; whenever there is time, Yi always comes to pick me up, taking me to enjoy various delicious foods and showing me the sights of the capital.

Yi snorted and said, "Tang Ziqi, do you think I don't know about that incident of yours? I even know about your embarrassing story of not being used to the public bath after a month of entering university! Do you think that's why I showed up at the entrance of K Hall waiting for you today?"

Therefore, when Yi asked me, I lied. I thought to myself that I wouldn't meet him today anyway. Who would have known that when I walked out of the KTV door, I would see Yi's car. The moment I saw his half-smiling, half-serious expression, I knew something was wrong. And his eyes, they contained only two words: "Danger."

One day in my senior year, after class, I returned to the dormitory and saw a black sedan parked downstairs. A man in a suit was leaning against the car door, smoking. Yu'er clicked her tongue and said, "Zi Qi, look at that man, he has a good build and looks quite spirited! Nice car, must be a wealthy person. I wonder which girl he is waiting for." I looked over, and indeed, he had a tall and slender figure, with a sharply defined profile. His lips seemed to hold a smile, and my heart skipped a beat, feeling a bit dizzy. That face, that smile. So familiar. Yes, a tall and slender figure, with a sharply defined profile, his lips seemed to hold a smile, and my heart skipped a beat, feeling a bit dizzy. That face, that smile. So familiar.

I have rejected various invitations from boys. However, the invitations keep coming one after another. The phrase I say most often is: "I have a boyfriend, and he will be back soon." The usual response is: "Give me a chance, Ziqi." They completely ignore the fact that I already have a boyfriend.

Year after year, I transitioned from being cheerful to silent and then back to being cheerful again. Gradually, I became familiar with the school environment, learned to pronounce the retroflex final, learned to eat radishes raw, and enjoyed pleasant interactions with my classmates. More and more of my roommates and classmates are entering into relationships, and I long to be like them, yet I can only respond with silence. I miss Yi, and the thought of him pains my heart.

Yi was quite angry: "Alright, you dressed up for that male classmate of yours and even lied! I have been worried about you all these years. It's not that I want to teach you a lesson today, but you have even learned to smoke!"

I miss home, I miss my mother, I miss Juanzi. I told Juanzi: "Beijing is so frightening, the people in this city speak polite words, yet they are hypocritically intimidating. I do not want to stay in Beijing, it is so lonely here"

I felt both ashamed and angry, yet unwilling to accept it, and I shouted, "I just like dressing this way! It's a classmate's birthday; is it wrong for me to want to dress up a little more beautifully?"

I stood still, afraid to walk over, fearing that the person I was thinking of was not him. I had no idea when the tears had begun to fall. Yu'er looked at me in surprise, repeatedly calling out: "Zi Qi, what’s wrong? What’s wrong with you?"

I carry the letter from Yi with me at all times. Without it, my heart would feel very empty. Only Yi's letter reminds me that there is indeed such a person who exists.

Yi stood vividly before me. I had been staring at him intently for many days. Yi looked at me with a pained expression and said, "I will not leave again." It took a long time for me to get used to his return

Juanzi has really annoyed me, saying: "Tang Ziqi, discussing military strategy on paper is a major taboo in warfare. You are engaging in a paper romance, which is a significant taboo in love! You better find a more reliable boyfriend, so I can have peace of mind!"

I looked at Yi in surprise, feeling that he was so unfamiliar: "How did you know?" I had learned to smoke out of curiosity and playfulness, following my classmates. And cigarettes were my best friends when I missed Yi alone. After Yi returned, I was afraid he would find out, so I stopped smoking, but how could he know? I never smoked in front of others.