Chapter 3, a cup, a lifetime

Little Mo, I never expected that you have been secretly admiring me all along

Nature is indeed real

I had barely settled into my chair when Jiang Chen arrived. He indeed presented himself in a well-dressed manner, with even his belt tied very neatly.

Xiao Hepao turned around and opened the door, and Jiang Chen walked into the room with a graceful demeanor

I have been entangled, conflicted, doubtful, and suffering until noon. For the first time in my life, I decided to be brave and test his feelings. If it were not for this uncertainty, I would have completely given up and devoted myself to being a matchmaker.

I stared at my master, and after a long while, I managed to utter a phrase: "The pure will clarify themselves." This phrase is usually employed when one wishes to defend oneself but finds it impossible to do so, resorting to it out of sheer helplessness. Today, I have come to understand its true meaning

Are you really sending it to me

Jiang Chen suddenly realized and exclaimed "Oh," as he took the makeup box from the bedside and handed it to me

He remained silent, took a deep breath, and turned to leave

He Xiaole rolled his eyes and said, "Did we not give you a gift? Hmph, how biased."

He walked to the door, and suddenly as if he remembered something, he stopped again, turned back, and smiled at me with a meaningful look: "Could it be that your gift of the golden lock means that love is stronger than gold, locking in a lifetime?"

He seemed to be suddenly struck by a spell of paralysis, standing there in a daze. However, although his body was stiff and unmoving, his eyes shimmered with a glimmering light, bright and radiant. They resembled those of a small pouch, yet also differed in some way, possessing an additional quality that I could not articulate

I emphasized the two instances of "ten million" with deliberate articulation

I feel dizzy and overwhelmed, speechless and choked up, I closed the door with a speed that could not be matched, I am not testing you, can't I just avoid you?

I was stunned, and at this moment, I finally understand why the clothing of the Xiaoyao Sect is made so loose.

He raised his eyes to look at me, paused for a moment, and said: "Xiao Mo, did every one of your senior brothers give you this cup?"

The night was quiet, and his voice was indeed somewhat melodious, carrying the resonance of an empty valley. My ears grew increasingly warm as I hurriedly glanced around the courtyard. A few senior brothers had turned their previously dark rooms back to light, and I could hear the sound of windows being opened. It seemed that all that was missing were the green, ghostly eyes, and I inhaled sharply.

In the courtyard, only Yunzhou remains

He only accepted a cup, but what I wanted to give him was a lifetime, alas

I took a breath of cold air, and my tooth ached. How is it that by such coincidence, the tears of longing would mistakenly be delivered into his hands

This, Brother He, is because he gave me a gift, and I have no way to repay him, so.

However, his expression was clearly different from that of the other senior brothers, who were all laughing and enjoying the spectacle. He, on the other hand, wore a cold expression and seemed quite unhappy. Aside from jealousy, I cannot think of any other reason.

I was taken aback; when did I summon him here?

How dare he say that, how did he treat me a couple of days ago? That makeup box and that blush, hum!

Loving someone does not necessarily mean being together with them; being able to see them happy and fulfilled is also a form of happiness. If in the future he is very happy, and occasionally thinks of me as the matchmaker when he looks at his beautiful wife, then I will be content. I can only comfort myself in this way, and I think it is enough to comfort myself twenty times a day until I feel numb, because when practicing, if my legs go numb, I no longer feel the pain

Who says no one is watching you? I watch you every day, and the more I look, the more I find you beautiful. Every time you take a bath, I feel as if a noble concubine is emerging from the water

Am I fickle? Am I teasing Jiang Chen? I feel as if I have been choked by a piece of stinky tofu, and after a long while, I can only say with grievance: "Master, I haven't done anything at all."

He unceremoniously took the gold lock from my palm and sincerely said, "Xiao Mo, you are truly good to me"

The senior brothers wore expressions of regret for having missed the opportunity to gather flowers, grumbling and complaining that their master had come too early, leaving them unsatisfied.

I shuddered suddenly and hurriedly said: "No! Absolutely not!"

I jumped up from the chair: "He is talking nonsense, I did nothing."

He crossed his arms and acted stubbornly: "Anyway, I won't return it to you"

The next morning, as soon as I opened the door, I encountered Senior Brother He Xiaole and Senior Brother Zhao Yebai.

I called out "Brother" in a flustered manner

Forget it, he has always been disorganized. If I were to argue with him, we would be entangled until dawn.

I sighed and said with a hint of displeasure, "Save some lamp oil, after all, no one is watching me."

He appeared to be trying to persuade me with both emotion and reason, and said softly: "I find this elegant and subtle way of expression quite good. This morning, in front of all the senior brothers, you forced me into a corner, and I truly cannot bear it. As a man, how can I endure such a loss of face?"

He seemed to have been called back to his senses, paused for a moment, and walked over with a smile, holding a bamboo cup in his hand

I ran into the bamboo forest, cut down a large bamboo, and then divided it into fifteen sections, making fifteen cups.

I stared at Jiang Chen in astonishment. Is it really necessary to discuss this matter privately? Wouldn't that make things even more ambiguous? I felt wronged and was on the verge of despair, hardly daring to look at Yun Zhou's expression.

I am not feeling very well, feeling lazy and unwilling to speak, even less inclined to move. Seeing me silent, the little pouch happily ran over to change my clothes

Jiang Chen's beautiful eyes sparkled as they fixed on me: "Xiao Mo, do you need something from me?"

He wore the gold lock around his neck, and we all saw it while he was bathing. He said it was a gift from you

Oh dear, this is serious, look at Xiaomo touching Jiang Chen's neck! Oh my goodness!

As I spoke, I pushed "a lifetime" forward, letting it all go.

I have always believed that if a person does not like you, even if you adorn yourself with seven colorful clouds, they may not even glance your way. In other words, if someone likes you merely because of your attractive attire, it does not necessarily mean they truly like you. Therefore, I have never paid much attention to my clothing; I usually dress similarly to my senior brothers, and when I go out at night, it is often difficult to distinguish between male and female.

It is just such a phrase, light as the breeze and clouds, without even a slight movement of the eyebrows

He looked at the golden lock in my palm, then glanced at me, his eyes sparkling with two small flames of excitement.

Oh my, Xiao Mo is so fierce, Jiang Chen, just give in!

He let out a sound, turned the cup in his hand, and then placed it on the table

The master, with a face as white as snow, was taken aback: "What is going on with the two of you pulling and tugging at each other? Who, who struck first?" The master may have been too agitated, as he actually referred to the act of fighting as striking down, which left me somewhat dissatisfied

I cast a timid glance at him. He was gazing at me, his expression cold and solemn, with a hint of displeasure and disappointment flickering in his eyes

The small pouch choked for a moment, then disdainfully looked at me and said: "Miss, you really have no sense of taste. Look at how this outfit accentuates the figure, truly curvaceous and exquisite. You should have dressed like this long ago."

Yun Zhou quietly stepped aside and calmly said, "I am not your brother," before brushing past me

The senior brothers say that I am biased, and they also say that it is a token of our affection. I cannot allow everyone to misunderstand the nature of our relationship

At this moment, time seems to stretch infinitely; he is just an arm's length away from me, yet it feels as if we are separated by thousands of mountains and rivers. My heartbeat suddenly soars like a Kunpeng spreading its wings for ninety thousand miles, and at times, it seems to resemble the Milky Way cascading down from the heavens.

I plan to give that cup of longing tears to Yunzhou, and then ask him a question

Look quickly, Xiao Mo is tugging at Jiang Chen's collar

I looked down and saw that this green dress fit snugly where it should and loosely where it should, its fresh green color vibrant, and the soft fabric flowing like a clear spring cascading down from the mountains, gently meandering across the flat ground. It wrapped my body in a way that was both ample and slender. Even I, looking at myself, felt that it was indeed quite enchanting

After fastening her belt, she exclaimed with great surprise: "Miss, you truly are a beauty; this outfit makes you look like a completely different person."

I took a few steps forward, mustering my courage, and said: "Brother, on my birthday, you all gave me gifts, so I would like to return the favor with a gift for everyone."

Little pouch busily said: "Miss, you misunderstand. The noble concubine emerging from the bath refers to your fair and delicate skin, but it does not imply that you are fat. Your figure, where it should be slender, is slender, and where it should be curvy, is curvy, making you quite graceful and beautiful." As she spoke, she swallowed a mouthful of saliva.

"Xiao Mo, don't be anxious. I will come to find you as soon as I get dressed." Behind me, Jiang Chen's melodious and distant call echoed again, filled with tender affection and a hint of water-like sound. Then I heard a few muffled chuckles; can't my senior brothers pretend they didn't hear?

I watched his silhouette, and an unexpected thought suddenly crossed my mind: could it be that he is feeling jealous

She brought the mirror and the candlestick in front of me, allowing me to see for myself

He raised his eyebrow and asked, "Why?"

The little pouch spoke while enviously staring at the bulging area on my chest, and I quickly crossed my arms to shield it. This girl, how can she be so unreserved? Indeed, having spent a long time in the Carefree Sect, she has become somewhat bold and unrestrained

The master lowered his gaze to the hem of his robe and said softly, "Xiao Mo, you have grown up. You can no longer play around with your senior brothers. It is acceptable within the Xiaoyao Sect, but if word gets out or if someone sees it, your reputation will be tarnished. Men and women should maintain a proper distance. Given the situation between you and Jiang Chen just now, if it were to be seen by outsiders, the only way to silence their gossip would be to become engaged."

I was taken aback and after a while, I asked: "How did you know?"

I hurriedly walked with my head down, almost colliding with someone. By the light of the moon, I looked up and was surprised to see it was Senior Brother Yunzhou.

I stared intently at his lips, fearing that his thin lips would utter the phrase "to offer oneself in devotion". Fortunately, he said "to express one's feelings" instead

His smile lines deepened, and his gaze became increasingly captivating.

I have nothing to say, indeed, every senior brother has given me a gift, and I only returned a gift to Jiang Chen, which does seem a bit biased

The imagination of my senior brothers is too rich, and their words are too impure. I really cannot continue any longer; even the roots of my ears are burning.

The little pouch twisted its waist and said: "Miss, why don't you give it a try? Just try it on and take it off, okay?"

I let out a long sigh, Amitabha

I never expected that this fierce side kick would be so striking and vivid. Accompanied by a crisp "sizzle," the green skirt tore open a large gash, and my calf unexpectedly revealed itself.

Upon seeing me, Brother He questioned, "Yun Mo, you are being too biased, aren't you? Why did you give Jiang Chen the gold lock and not us?"

I also secretly wiped away a bit of sweat, never expecting that giving gifts also has its intricacies, and one misstep can easily lead to misunderstandings. Fortunately, Jiang Chen is straightforward; if he doesn't understand something, he asks directly, otherwise the consequences would be unimaginable

Alas, the falling flowers and flowing water signify the departure of spring, a realm between heaven and earth. I emerged from his room, feeling dejected, and haphazardly distributed the remaining cups to my senior brothers before falling into a deep sleep.

Senior Brother Zhao has always had a loud voice; the words coming from the small speaker were clear and distinct to me, causing my heart to tremble

What if, what if he is feeling jealous? What if, what if he has a little bit of affection for me?

"You have touched him, looked at him, what more do you want?" The master glanced at me and left with a flushed face, feeling embarrassed

I looked at the phrase "a lifetime" on the table, feeling utterly disappointed. Suddenly, I realized that in a moment of nervousness, I had mistakenly taken the wrong one, substituting the tears of longing for the farewell poem Wang Lun sent to Li Bai. However, I had stated it so clearly, deliberately saying "a cup" as "a lifetime"; how could he possibly not hear the difference? He is such an exceptionally intelligent person.

He nodded slightly and said with a smile, "Yes, I also asked other senior brothers, and it turns out that this cup of longing tears is the only one, and you have given it solely to me. This sentiment, I, I have no way to repay, only to come in the deep of night..." He paused and did not continue, gazing at me with tender affection, his thin lips curling into a smile as gentle as the spring waves.

Little Bag said: "Miss, you are actually very beautiful, but the robe you are wearing is truly unflattering. People are adorned by their clothing, just as horses are adorned by their saddles. Why not try on those few outfits?"

The senior brothers kindly said to me: "Xiao Mo, it is only natural that you find it difficult to control your feelings for Jiang Chen, who is so charming and dashing. We understand you and will never speak of it to others." After saying this, they all left with understanding.

I also feel quite embarrassed. As a man, my master sincerely confides in me with these private matters, which is truly difficult for him. However, he also fails to understand my feelings. Where exactly am I being fickle? I have been preoccupied in my room, continuously analyzing and pondering over Yunzhou's performance today.

Jiang Chen pulled his sleeve back from my hand and let out a heavy sigh of relief, as if he had narrowly escaped a tiger's mouth, saying: "Yes, fortunately you reminded me, otherwise I would have definitely thought in the wrong direction and would have spent the whole night unable to sleep"

As soon as this thought bubbled up, I immediately dismissed it with a "bang". How could that be! Upon hearing that Master was matchmaking for me, he immediately became melancholic and drowned his sorrows in alcohol, then vehemently accused me of being foolish, which I witnessed with my own eyes. Therefore, I must absolutely, absolutely not indulge in my own feelings.

The master awkwardly cleared his throat twice and said, "Xiao Mo, what kind of decorum is this, touching faces and necks during a spar?" As he spoke, his face turned slightly red, as if he were the one being touched, leaving me somewhat speechless

What brings you here in the dead of night? My heart is so frightened that it can hardly beat.

I am feeling quite anxious, turning things over in my mind, contemplating from various angles, yet the result is that I cannot understand.

I became anxious as soon as I heard it, and when I looked again, I noticed a chain faintly visible at his collar, undoubtedly hanging my gold lock.

Suddenly, a voice from outside the door called out, "Xiao Mo, I have arrived"

The flush on my face immediately faded, and I stared at him in a daze, my palms felt empty, and my heart was even more desolate, plummeting to an abyss.

I handed him the small golden lock and said: "You always give me things, and I haven't really returned the favor. This is a small token of my appreciation for you."

He pretended not to understand, effortlessly brushing aside that remark as if it were a withered leaf swept up by an inappropriate autumn breeze

His gaze was as clear as a deep spring, pure and sharp in its transparency. The moment I met his eyes, I felt a twinge of shame, and so I stammered out a sentence I had been holding back all afternoon: "I give you my whole life, what do you think?"

Absolutely not! I was taken aback and hurriedly tugged at his sleeve, stating with righteous indignation: "No, this is a safety lock, usually prepared by a mother for her child to ensure safety. Brother Jiang, you must, must not think otherwise"

Jiang Chen tightly covered his collar, resembling a chaste and virtuous wife, and said angrily: "Master, I need to discuss this matter with you privately."

He set down his pen and turned to look at me

After waking up, I reflected deeply and finally became clear-headed. Only a fairy-like girl is worthy of him, and I still have a bit of self-awareness; I should just play the role of a matchmaker. You see, in that script, there is only one young lady, while most are just supporting roles.

The long night is tedious, my heart is empty and desolate. I am utterly bored, unprecedentedly without any objections, allowing the small pouch to tidy me up. The small pouch took off the off-white carefree robe from me and replaced it with a fitted green dress.

I have a toothache

I know that what she mentioned refers to the few pieces of clothing sent in that bundle, which are indeed of good material and color, but I have never worn them. In previous years, I have given them to Xiao Hepao, but this year, I have not yet had the chance to give them to her

I took another breath, gritted my teeth, and asked: "Did you ask Yunzhou?"

He is standing in front of the table, poised to paint. The azaleas by the window are blooming vibrantly in red, and a piece of rice paper is spread out on the table, with a small jade Pixiu pressing down on it. He is creating a painting; in my eyes, he has already become part of the artwork.

He silently took the cup from my hand, examined it closely for a moment, and said softly: "This cup is really nice, your hands are very skillful"

As the small grappling techniques do not require internal strength and rely on skillful finesse, I can manage to cope with a few moves, albeit barely, in a short period of time

"That won't do." He underestimated my intentions. I am not the kind of person who would reciprocate his gifts with the expectation of receiving something in return. I truly cannot allow anyone to misunderstand the nature of my relationship with him, especially not Yunzhou.

Token of love! I feel that I have probably made a mistake and need to correct it quickly

I was taken aback and hurriedly said, "Master, I was just sparring with him." How could a careless touch to his neck during the sparring lead to such serious consequences

I hurriedly found Jiang Chen and got straight to the point: "Jiang Chen, I cannot give you that gold lock."

He looked displeased: "How can one ask for something back after giving it to someone?"

In fact, I have not been very kind to him. His compliment made me feel somewhat embarrassed, and I cleared my throat a couple of times

I felt somewhat unnatural under his unwavering gaze. I am accustomed to the loose garments of the Carefree Sect, and this outfit is far too revealing, tense and confrontational. Wearing it, I truly do not feel carefree.

I took a cursory glance in the mirror and said listlessly: "Isn't it just that the cabbage has turned into green onions?"

His sleeve brushed against the back of my hand, cool and ethereal. I stared blankly at his silhouette fading into the night, feeling a deep sense of guilt in my heart. He must have been deeply hurt by me, to the point of refusing to act as a brother. I must quickly make amends for my mistakes, but where can I find that enchanting fairy? Apart from myself, the only one in the Xiaoyao Sect is the little pouch; a skilled woman finds it difficult to cook without rice. With a heart full of aspirations as a matchmaker, I truly feel despondent.

Quickly go and call the master! Something is about to happen!

In a state of panic, I forgot what I was about to say, as well as the matter of returning the favor. With my ears burning, I turned and left.

This is for you, and you need not return this gold lock.

I chose a very safe and discreet method

I will not be polite any longer, employing the techniques of the Carefree Sect's minor grappling skills, and I will take it myself. He also did not hold back, actually engaging me in a contest of skills. We fought from indoors to outdoors, unarmed.

I said solemnly: "I think the same way. If it were someone else, I would never do this, but you are an exception. Last time, you treated me this way, so I will not be polite with you. You will surely understand me."

The senior brothers chuckled and comforted him, saying: "It's alright, since it concerns your reputation, we will never speak of it to anyone."

Unexpectedly, we were soon surrounded by several senior brothers.

The little pouch gazed at me intently, displaying a look of envy. Even though this gaze came from a girl, I felt somewhat uneasy and had a strong desire to take off my skirt

He shouted from behind: "Xiao Mo, do you need something from me?"

In fact, even without the moonlight, I can roughly tell it is him. Because among the entire Xiaoyao Sect, the tallest figures are him and Jiang Chen, and I happen to reach the shoulders of both.

I sat in the room in a daze. The sky had darkened completely, and I had no desire to light a lamp, feeling as if my heart was empty, like a hollow bamboo cup.

I am at a loss for words; this group of senior students truly seems to thrive on chaos

The consequence of my endless pondering is that it has rekindled the ashes of a heart that was already filled with despair

The desire to die has resurfaced, yet I have once again come back to life

The imperial concubine emerges from the bath! I was momentarily blinded, feeling as if I could die, and tremblingly asked, "Little pouch, have I really become that fat?"

He had an undeniable look of solid evidence, and then said: "I was so surprised that I couldn't believe it, so I specifically ran to Yunzhou's room to ask him. It turns out that the bamboo cup you gave him was engraved with the story of Wang Lun sending it to Li Bai"

Little pouch clapped and exclaimed: "Young Master Jiang, quickly look, my young lady's skin is so fair!"

I spent the entire afternoon feeling frustrated with myself, and I ate a hearty dinner. Finally, as dusk was about to merge into the night, I took my cup and, with the wind rustling and the waters of the Yi River cold, I set off to the residence in Yunzhou, like a valiant warrior who departs and never returns.

The master and Jiang Chen entered the room, and as Jiang Chen closed the door, he cast a resentful glance at me.

I do not quite understand the concerns of girls. Today you like Yun Zhao, and tomorrow you like Jiang Chen. Such fickleness is unacceptable. If you continue to tease Jiang Chen, I will have no choice but to take matters into my own hands for him

I let out a lackluster "yes". It seems that keeping a backup plan was the right choice; having failed the test, I can still excuse myself by saying that other senior brothers also gifted cups, thus discreetly covering up the matter.

Jiang Chen lightly leaped back to the door, looking at me with a half-smile, half-tease: "Xiao Mo, you flirt with me during the day and seduce me at night, are you trying to test my self-control?"

I cleared my throat and said, "What is the matter?"

The master twitched his lips and said, "The senior brothers can also testify."

The little pouch came in from outside and was startled to see me sitting in the dark room

I awkwardly covered my skirt and shot a blushing glare at the little pouch. Whose maid is she, after all?

He frowned and complained, "I wasn't loud; it was just my usual tone. Perhaps it's especially clear at night."

I held the peace gold lock in my palm and shot him a glance, saying: "Why did you shout so loudly just now?"

He smiled, his long, fair fingers pointing at a line of poetry on the cup, and said softly: "You see, the wine enters the sorrowful heart, transforming into tears of longing."

I let out a long sigh, as if all the strength in my body, all my courage and hopes, had dissipated into the vastness of the sky, leaving nothing behind

I have completely given up. He is indeed indifferent towards me. This naked confession of mine, the first time I have ever acted with such reckless courage, has thus turned to ashes.

I engraved a line of poetry on one of the cups with the small dagger sent by Yunzhou: "When wine enters the sorrowful intestines, it transforms into tears of longing." On the other bamboo cups, I randomly engraved phrases such as "The water of the Peach Blossom Pool is a thousand feet deep, yet it cannot compare to the affection Wang Lun has for me," and "Year after year, the flowers are similar, yet the people are different each year."

"Xiao Mo, don't go!" He shouted again, and I felt a tingling sensation on my scalp, as if I could inexplicably detect a tone filled with deep affection and lingering emotions. This fellow is definitely doing it on purpose!

Senior Brother Zhao stealthily cupped a small horn in his hand and whispered in Senior Brother He's ear: "That is a token of love, let’s go, stop arguing."

His smile brought forth the spring in his brows, and when I recalled his appearance in the morning, resembling a chaste and virtuous husband, and then thought of him flaunting his tears of longing everywhere, I, unable to endure any longer, kicked out with a sweeping motion as if to disperse the clouds.

I am speechless

I was in a state of distress in the room when my master came in with his hands clasped behind his back. Upon seeing me, he first cast a lingering glance in my direction, then let out a deep sigh, and finally spoke in a subdued tone: "Xiao Mo, Jiang Chen said that you have wronged him."

When Master and Yunzhou hurriedly arrived, Jiang Chen was tightly covering his collar, looking as if he had been wronged and was determined not to yield.

The moment I saw him, I felt a bit agitated. Just now, I clearly approached him with an open and honest intention, yet in the blink of an eye, his few shouts turned the situation into a dark and windy night, reminiscent of the tale of Yingying and Zhang Sheng. Not only was I misunderstood by my senior brothers, but unfortunately, I was also seen by Yunzhou. Thinking of this, I felt quite displeased.

A thought stirred within me, and I wanted to explain, yet I did not know how to articulate it