Chapter 1: The Mortician

I said, Ding Li, why does your statement sound so off? Am I that kind of person...

Oh my, this little voice is so sweet it could kill me...

Well! Shaoyu and Kuizi have a pretty good relationship

Chen Guangda stormed out of the courtyard, for the one thing he despised most in life was people who flaunted themselves even more than he did. However, just as he reached the car, he spotted a beautiful young woman hiding under a tree, fanning herself. Her alluring figure, with prominent curves, was quite tempting. Nevertheless, Chen Guangda approached her and casually said, "Oh, sister-in-law! Why aren't you going in with Shaoyu? It must be quite hot out here!"

Wow! So many conquests, by the way, how did he die again? Was it a stroke...

A handsome man suddenly approached and, upon seeing Chen Guangda, mocked him, saying: "If I remember correctly, you and Kui Zi were the most at odds back in the day. He has died, so you should be quite happy, right? Why are you crying as if your own mother has died?"

As soon as Chen Guangda got out of the car, he shouted a phrase at several elderly women, and a group of professional mourners immediately burst into loud wailing. The sound of lamentation doubled, and Chen Guangda quickly took the opportunity to apply two drops of eye medication, then with a "Wow," he rushed into their small courtyard

Oh, Liuzi! The performance just now was quite good...

The young woman fanned herself irritably and then turned her head to say sharply: "If you ask me, that guy is just out of luck. He had been a stubborn resident for several years, and just when the government agreed to his family's demands, he passed away, leaving behind five to six million in assets to be given to his wife as a dowry. What a short-lived fellow!"

The young woman, not knowing whether she had long since cried all her tears, numbly nodded her head. Chen Guangda, wiping his tears, stood up and prepared to arrange the mourning hall. He had previously loaded a truck with his main products, which were worth at least seven or eight thousand yuan. Even if he gave his old classmate a 30% discount, he would still make a considerable profit

A few old classmates rushed over to hold onto Chen Guangda, their eyes inevitably moistening. Chen Guangda, after a long period of despair and wailing, finally ceased his cries and turned to squat in front of a widow dressed in mourning attire, sorrowfully saying: "Sister-in-law! Please take care of yourself during this difficult time. If there is anything you need in the future, do not hesitate to let me know; your matters will be my matters from now on!"

Chen Guangda subconsciously nodded, but his gaze involuntarily drifted towards Li Lan, who was dressed in mourning attire inside the room. Although the man from Kuizi looked rather unremarkable, his wife was exceptionally beautiful, quiet, and delicate. It is hard to understand what went wrong in her thinking that she would marry a poor fellow like the man from Kuizi.

I would never step into that house filled with misfortune. I have been running around all morning for this family's trivial matters, and it is utterly disgusting to me

Damn it! A pair of shameless scoundrels, if they don't cheat you, who will...

Hello there, sister-in-law! Speaking of money can indeed hurt feelings. I have been close friends with Kui for many years, and from now on, I will take care of everything related to your family. I will definitely ensure that he leaves in great style

A solemn and mournful melody suddenly emanated from outside the car, abruptly interrupting Chen Guangda's daydreaming. He hurriedly drove the car in front of a pile of pale white wreaths and leaned forward to look at his reflection in the mirror, noticing that he had already begun to gain weight. Although this was not the physique one would expect from a twenty-eight-year-old young man, he always felt that being a bit plump added to the air of authority befitting a boss

Liu Shaoyu! Is that how you speak? When a person dies, their debts are settled, do you understand? Any grievances I had with him have all vanished...

Chen Guangda rolled his eyes in annoyance and ostentatiously took out a pack of Zhonghua cigarettes, but Liu Shaoyu leisurely lit a Jiu Wu Zhi Zun cigarette. After giving him a strange laugh, he walked into the house. Chen Guangda immediately spat in disdain and said, "Pah! What is this? Just because you have a bit of money, you think you're something special!"

"Liuzai! Liuzai! Do not be too agitated; a person cannot be brought back to life after death. Please accept my condolences and adapt to the changes..."

Six sons

In a moment of distraction, Chen Guangda was approached by Li Lan, who softly said to him: "Kuizi's parents passed away early, and I have no siblings to support me. I will have to trouble you with the funeral arrangements tomorrow. I will definitely pay you the full amount for the expenses."

Chen Guangda picked up his phone and sent a voice message, casually hitting the not-so-powerful air conditioner. Soon, music began to play over the broadcast, and his Xiaomi phone chimed as well. He heard a voice, just as sweet as the one on the broadcast, laughing and saying: "No way! Little rascal, I have to cover for a colleague tonight. Let's meet another day. I won't say much since I'm still live!"

Chen Guangda hurriedly straightened his back, took out one thousand yuan from his pocket, and stuffed it into her hand. Li Lan smiled gratefully at him before returning to the house. However, the woman next to her sarcastically remarked, "Look at how bright your eyes are; you must be thinking about her. I think you might as well take advantage of the situation now. After all, widows and bachelors make a perfect match, and she has such a substantial dowry. If you wait too long, you might miss out on a good deal!"

A corpse covered with burlap lay stiffly in the living room, yet Chen Guangda showed no fear at all. He directly lunged onto the corpse, crying out in despair: "My dear brother, how could you leave us? How are we, your old classmates, supposed to live on without you!"

"Tao Tao! I just landed a major contract, with a project volume of over a billion. This is such a joyous occasion; you should come out and celebrate with me..."

Chen Guangda was taken aback and put down the cigarette he was about to light. The young woman shook her head and said, "Even the coroner can't clarify the situation; it seems to be a case of sudden death. I heard she had been running a fever for some time, and then this morning she was found dead in bed. If it weren't for my husband, who has a sense of nostalgia and sought help for her, a mere widow like Li Lan would probably not even be able to set up a mortuary!"

He climbed into his Santana 3000 with nine hands, and after habitually glancing at the funeral supplies in the back of the car to ensure nothing was missing, he cheerfully drove towards the funeral site. Soon, the slightly noisy speakers began to play the voice of his dream lover, Su Tong, gently and sweetly announcing the news to everyone

Chen Guangda frowned and glared at her, but Ding Li sneered and said: "Chen Liuzi! Stop pretending in front of me. It was you who organized my husband's uncle's funeral, right? The ten packs of Zhonghua cigarettes you burned for him were all fake. You even dared to swindle the money of the deceased. What else are you capable of? Moreover, that young widow might not even look at you. You should take a good look in the mirror, you poor loser!"

Thank you, Liuzi

Mid-July is precisely when the sun is at its most scorching, and at noon, it feels as if one is being roasted to a crisp. However, Chen Guangda is in high spirits, boldly stepping out into the blazing sun. Although he is about to attend a funeral, this is, for him, a matter of joy, as the death of a person signifies the arrival of business for him, even if...! ... the deceased is his old classmate! Although he is about to attend a funeral, this is, for him, a matter of joy, as the death of a person signifies the arrival of business for him, even if...! ... the deceased is his old classmate!

"All of you, cry more pitifully. If you can't shed tears, you won't get any money..."

Ding Li cast him a glance filled with extreme disdain, then turned her ample backside and got into a red Mercedes, exuding an arrogance akin to that of an Antarctic penguin. Chen Guangda was so infuriated that he felt like going up to her and punching her in the chest. This couple truly were despicable individuals who looked down on others with contempt!

Chen Guangda angrily opened the car, skillfully moving out the funeral items he was about to use. However, as soon as he walked into the house, he suddenly froze, looking strangely at the corpse on the door panel, puzzled he said: "Hey? Did it seem to move just now? Am I going to suffer from heatstroke?"

Chen Guangda was overwhelmed with excitement as he called out. Although he had not yet met Su Tong in person, the photos of her posted on the radio were truly breathtaking, resembling a celestial being. He could not help but wonder how many times they had fought side by side. Just the thought of Su Tong's long legs in black stockings made Chen Guangda wish he could die in her presence for the thrill of it.