Chapter Nine, Jokes

"Don't go," Shitou said, reaching out to grab me. "I'm afraid you, you rascal, will go back and wash the medicine again. I have to keep an eye on you every day for the next few days! No messing around! Otherwise, I'll tell your grandmother!"

He is indeed a tight-lipped child who can keep secrets, but it is absolutely out of the question to tell him about the time-travel novels. So I sighed and said: "When I was young, I had my fortune told, and it was said that I would grow up to be a stunning beauty who brings disaster to the country and its people, and that I am fated to have romantic entanglements; only by ruining my looks can I ensure a lifetime of peace."

Such a treacherous beast! Do not expect me to feed it chicken bones again in the future

Outside the yard is a grove of mulberry and elm trees, next to which stands a dilapidated thatched house that is uninhabited. I hurriedly ran inside, seeing that the stone did not follow, and closed the rotten bamboo door behind me, breathing heavily, preparing to wait for it to leave before returning home

I nodded heavily

How vexing! The thoughts of an eight-year-old child are truly difficult to fathom

The corner of the stone's eye twitched twice: "I didn't feel anything..."

"Is it not acceptable for me to like the ugly monster look?" I pushed him away and walked out the door

Unexpectedly, about a quarter of an hour later, a few cheerful barks came from outside the thatched house. Shitou, full of pride, kicked open the bamboo door and led my big yellow dog inside, saying in a landlord's bully tone: "Where do you think you're running? Can you escape from my Five Finger Mountain?"

Grandmother said resentfully: "A smiling tiger, all you know is how to pretend to be virtuous! That gold bracelet of yours weighs less than three taels, and its color is old; how much is it worth? The whole house is piled with personal belongings, yet you are unwilling to part with them."

Is he the tapeworm in my stomach? I am even more frustrated

In the desolate mountains and wild ridges, I, a little girl, suffered a terrible ordeal. Not only did I call out to the heavens in vain, but the earth also did not respond. Even my cries for help were futile. He smeared my mouth with a flavor reminiscent of lotus flowers, leaving me with a bitter taste that was unbearable.

"Alright," after finishing painting the stone, it climbed down from me with satisfaction and sat beside me, complaining, "Clearly, it is an ugly creature, yet it allows the wound to worsen, isn't that just adding ugliness to ugliness? Although father says that a woman should value virtue over beauty, and I, as a prime minister, can tolerate a lot and do not mind your lack of looks, you foolish one, you cannot deliberately ruin your appearance!"

I swear, I will never tell the truth to anyone again in this lifetime! Everything still depends on oneself!

The sound of kowtowing gradually emerged

"Puh—" The stone finally couldn't hold back any longer, laughing so hard that it rolled on the ground, wiping its tears as it said, "Silly girl, I'll take you back later to have someone read your fortune again, and then we'll get the doctor to prescribe some more medicine, so that your hysteria doesn't worsen. Hahaha—still a peerless beauty, huh..."

The big yellow dog wagged its tail submissively beside, showing no intention of rescuing its master

The stone rolled up its sleeves and beckoned me with its finger: "Come here! Don't make me use force!"

"What is so great about literacy? I can definitely learn it faster than you!" Stone helped me pull out a few weeds behind me and said with a smile, "Why are you so foolish? From your head to your mouth, you look worse every day, as if you are deliberately trying to ruin your appearance."

In ancient tradition, a married daughter is like water that has been poured out, and a child living under someone else's roof has even less say. As long as I am not mistreated in terms of food and clothing, that is already quite good; making a fuss will only bring more misfortune. Moreover, those items were left to Lin Luor by her mother, hidden away by her grandmother. I have never seen them and do not have a sense of ownership over them, so it is better to let go.

Aunt was also anxious: "Those two sets of jewelry are also for your grandson to marry in the future, aren't they still part of the Li family?"

The stone may be consumed, yet it remains silent

My cousin waved at me from the kitchen, and I did not hear the rest of what was said. During the meal, my aunt had a beaming smile on her face; she had killed a chicken and gave the drumsticks to my cousin, while she also served me two extra pieces of meat. Although my second uncle's eyes were red, he was still smiling and had a couple of drinks with my eldest uncle. My grandmother, however, wore a worried expression. Therefore, I believe their wishes have been fulfilled

Aunt also chimed in: "In the past two years, the grain harvest has been poor, and our family is also facing famine, with so many mouths to feed. The amount of debt incurred by my younger uncle is considerable; his wife has scraped together everything, even taking out her own gold bracelet, yet there is still a shortfall. The remaining amount cannot be touched for Xiulan's dowry, can it? She is getting married next year; how can we allow her in-laws to look down on her? Anyway, the little girl Luo is only eight years old, and there are still several years to go. Let my younger uncle first make up the capital, and in the future, he can earn it back and return it to her just the same."

The stone let out a "hum" and did not respond

If you don't know how to use a pun, then don't use it carelessly! I patted my head full of dry grass, straightened my disheveled clothes, and felt an anger that couldn't be quelled... Yet, such matters are not easy to report when I go back; I am injured but cannot apply medicine, and telling anyone would only lead to more beatings...

I feel a bit regretful; having grown up, I still act impulsively in my words and actions, quarreling over trivial matters like a child. He is immature, but can I afford to be immature as well? If I miss this good match, which is based on mutual understanding, finding a family in the future that is less troubled and burdensome will be a gamble.

I lament: "You will not understand, some things are better left unknown to others"

I shook my head vigorously: "The big yellow dog had a litter of puppies, and the black one is named Spare Tire..."

No wonder, apart from being the publicity minister in elementary school, I have never held any position, truly a failure. Those female protagonists who thrived in ancient times would surely be capable of holding official positions and leading in reality. ... I can't even handle a small ghost, I deserve to be exploited by my boss

The evening glow gradually faded, shedding its brilliant red veil, and the wandering flock of chickens proudly returned to their coop. From the window, I saw Shi Tou running over, and I immediately abandoned my embroidery practice, jumped out of bed, rushed to the door, and climbed over the wall to escape

The stone trembled and asked: "Are you hiding because you are afraid that the young master of the Nangong family likes you?! Is he also one of the lecherous ones?"

Currently, the most significant issue I need to address is stones

Stone took a step forward, pushing me down onto the pile of grass, and then unceremoniously sat on my waist, pinning my hands down with his knees. He then pulled out a small medicine box gifted by the Nangong family from his pocket, selected a large piece, and began to apply it to my chin.

The stone pressed me to sit down again, and after thinking for a while, said: "I don't believe you like the ugly appearance; there must be a reason. Silly girl, if you encounter difficulties, it's not good to keep them to yourself. It would be better to share them with me; perhaps I can help you."

I am still young! In a few years, it will be too late! The fortune teller also said that there will be many lecherous men who will harm me! I must take action early, and you must not tell anyone about this matter.

The book "The Art of Thick Black Theory" states that those who achieve great things must not only possess high intelligence but also high emotional intelligence. One must think carefully before speaking and act slowly. My intelligence is average, and my emotional intelligence is severely lacking. I am always unable to see the bigger picture and cannot learn from others who skillfully and effortlessly resolve all matters with just a few clever moves.

Upon returning to Lijia Village, I politely bid farewell to Uncle Tietou, carrying a small package containing dough figurines, and headed home. Just as I reached the courtyard, I heard shouting coming from my grandmother's room: "How could you raise such an ungrateful wretch! It's one thing to squander money over the past two years, but now you even want to calculate the dowry of Luo girl. Do you really think the old woman is dead?"

I decided to make amends, pushing the pine nut candy towards Shitou, with a forced smile: "What I just said was all out of anger, don't take it to heart."

I heard my name and hurriedly tiptoed to the window to eavesdrop. Inside, I heard the crying of a strange man, and my uncle was comforting him: "Mother, please do not be angry. Second brother was also deceived in business. A few years ago, he helped our family quite a bit and has been filial to you. Could it be that you truly wish to see him driven to death by debt?"

I cautiously poked my head out from behind the broken jar and stubbornly said, "I didn't run away."

The stone patted its chest and assured: "I am not some meddlesome relative, when have I ever gossiped? Moreover, if you call me 'big brother', your matters become my matters, and I will certainly help you."

On the way back, Shitou wore a sullen expression and did not speak to me again. Uncle Tietou sensed that the relationship between the two children was strange, so he bought a bag of pine nut candy for us in an attempt to mediate.

I huddled in the corner, clutching my head, resolutely refusing to yield.

The big yellow dog kept barking, and in the cold night wind, I felt a deep sense of shame and silently turned my head away

This line for rejecting someone was delivered quite naturally. After finishing, I secretly glanced at Shitou, and his expression softened considerably, though his words remained tough: "I can't be bothered to deal with you! Also, who is the backup? Is it someone from our village?"

I am being serious. That guy's reaction made me stomp my feet in anger

I lowered my head, playing with the hem of my clothes in a bashful manner, and said softly: "Actually, I don't quite understand what it means to like someone, but you are a good person. I treat you like an older brother, someone who can protect me, so I don't dislike you at all"

"Mother, considering your son's usual filial piety towards you, please help me out." The cries of my second uncle grew increasingly louder, "Are you really going to force me to sell our ancestral land and house? Your son has bowed to you... please save me."

The expression on his face stiffened, and I couldn't understand what had gotten into his head, as he stopped talking to me again

"Indeed, indeed, you will be the most beautiful woman in the world, and I will be the greatest master in the world in the future." Shitou laughed so hard that he could hardly catch his breath, looking at me as if he were gazing at Sister Furong.