Chapter 10, Not Yet Lovers

At this moment, I finally realized how significant the gap is between ideals and reality

I almost cried out loud, but fearing to lose my composure, I quickly covered my mouth with my hand, and tears streamed down my face. Is this what they call crying tears of joy

Is it not cruel that one cannot call it youth?

However, because it was your first time knitting, one glove turned out larger than the other, making it somewhat ill-fitting for you. Yet, you still cheerfully put it on your hand, looking so happy as if you had received the most precious gift in the world

Every time at this moment, she gets so angry that she almost spits blood, probably cursing me in her dreams as this unfilial daughter

I do not like noses that are so flat

This statement sounds like something you would say, and it is pleasing to my ears

However, Moxi will definitely not dislike me; he will surely stroke my bald head and say to me: "Qingtong, you look really good, really good, the skin on your head is truly nice..."

Cheng Qingtong, you are indeed more intelligent and capable than I imagined. What is most important is that you are exceptionally skilled at winning a man's heart

I will no longer be so excited

Life seems to have changed once again, and I can no longer even aspire to the most ordinary and peaceful kind of existence

The relationship between Moxi and me is even more subdued than the lyrics of this song. It is like a glass of plain water, very calm and very pure. However, after spending so much time together, we have begun to rely on each other, and this involuntary trust that has developed brings me comfort

Qingtong, if you truly like Moxi, then keep it up. I can see that he has feelings for you, but his heart has endured too much and he cannot let someone into his heart so quickly. You will have to wait

If it were not for Moxi being sent by the school to teach in the mountainous area, I thought I would spend my life with him, waiting for the day when he finally noticed me by his side and then brought me home as his wife. That was my plan, and I had envisioned everything so perfectly. However, the sudden work arrangement moved you to a place so far away from me.

The phone rang several times with a beeping sound, and finally, just as it was about to disconnect, it was answered

Thus, I was compelled to evaluate the person I was about to meet for a blind date with her. My mother's linguistic skills are not to be underestimated, but I belong to a direct line of inheritance, and it is effortless for me to refuse.

Hello, stylist, please give me a buzz cut

The apple in my hand was squeezed until juice flowed out, and I hurriedly picked up the phone, preparing to call Moxi.

Xiao Han, feeling better... Aunt Ye's voice was filled with sobs, and there was no trace of joy in her tone

I did not have the grand ambitions as stated upon my enrollment, to become a manager, a boss, an organizer, or a planner in a large company. I have merely become a small clerk in a small company

I nodded slightly, remaining silent. He stood in front of me, his gaze particularly resolute

She did not know where she had brought back a stack of photos, and then she sat in front of me with a smile, sitting cross-legged, her arms tightly wrapped around mine, making it impossible for me to escape.

And waiting for you has become the only thing I want to do, so it is only natural to hope that time can pass a little faster

My mother came in from outside, and upon seeing my appearance, she was flustered. After glancing at the news report and then looking at me, she roughly understood what had happened

The first ... ...

Why do I find this line so familiar? I can't help but laugh; isn't this exactly what I once said to Moxi?

Moxi, after waiting for so many years, I have finally received a kiss from you

In other words, she has been using the threat of me not being able to get married to scare me, hoping that I will quickly find a boyfriend, but each time I have decisively rejected the idea without hesitation

At this moment, the list of the deceased was announced on the television screen, and the three characters "Mo Xi Yi" pierced my pupils.

... ...

We will not embrace, nor will we hold each other tightly for warmth during the cold winter.

Before the match, I was feeling quite anxious. It was only after my mother encouraged and persuaded me for a long time that I finally mustered the courage.

Oh

My emotions became uncontrollable in an instant, and I collapsed to the ground, feeling a chill throughout my body, with all my pores wide open. I nearly crushed the apple in my hand, and even breathing became quite uncomfortable

Hit me! If you are not afraid of hurting my feelings, then go ahead! What kind of parent pushes their own daughter to marry off!

I gently bit my lip and gazed at him affectionately

Moxi, can you bear it?

Every day after work, I return home to find a table full of delicious dishes waiting for me, and the gentle nagging of my elder still lingers in my ears. After dinner, I wash the plates and clean the bowls, while she chats with the neighbors in the yard, creating a peaceful atmosphere

Yes, Auntie, I am Qingtong. I would like to... I want to ask, um, how is Xiaohan's illness? Has she improved a bit? Has she woken up?

After work that day, I finished all my tasks early and made an international call to Ye Bihan's parents

I smiled at him, and his eyes were as bright as when I first met him. However, he was no longer so proud, nor so serious; warmth was reflected in his gaze. This is perhaps the mark of time.

Cheng Qingtong, you really are quite bold; you don't mind losing face, while I find it embarrassing! To refuse someone, you actually cut your hair so short! Is this the only way you know how to cut hair? Why not just shave it all off? You might as well become a monk! I wonder if that Moxi will still want you after you become a monk...

I wept silently, tears streaming down my face, continuously murmuring the name of Moxi Yi, yet you could no longer hear me

It was only when I casually sat in front of him that he looked at me with suspicion and said, "Sir, I have already reserved this place; could you please sit elsewhere?"

She removed her heavy makeup, and now she looks fresh and beautiful, providing a visually pleasing experience

Echoes resound, again and again

In a moment of emotion, one laughs while risking their life

After work, I went to the school, wanting to see him and also to take a look at the campus. People always have a fondness for nostalgia and tend to be sentimental. Back when I was in school, I was always out and about, but now that I am outside, I find myself wanting to carve out time to return.

In the most beautiful years of my youth, I only dared to love you in the name of friendship, igniting my love for you with all my youth

This is truly wonderful

Mom, Xiaohan can no longer be saved, she will never be well again, Uncle said that we must take care of her until her last moment

We have walked until the sun set in the west, the sky gradually turning deep blue, and stars slowly appearing. However, the conversation seems to have never ceased, continuing from the very beginning to the present. It has been a long time since we chatted like this, and after finishing, I feel refreshed.

"Don't call me Mom. The world is so vast, where am I supposed to find someone exactly like Moxi for you? If you still consider me as your mother, then you should go on a blind date for me tomorrow, a blind date!" The last two words nearly shattered my eardrums

I cannot even see the silhouette.

However, we will not hold hands, nor will we swing our hands back and forth freely like other couples do.

Hearing him mock himself like this, I couldn't help but want to laugh; the once arrogant Moxi Yi is now able to make jokes about himself like this.

The voice on the other end was mechanical: The number you have dialed is temporarily unavailable, please try again later

I chuckled softly, offering no explanation, for the bitterness within is known only to me

Tears condense into mist, the pain gnaws at the bones and is never forgotten. Over time, it becomes deeply etched in the heart.

Qingtong, take a look at this person. They are tall and energetic, and their family consists entirely of civil servants. Their conditions are quite good. Why don't you go meet them?

I remember there is a song titled "Unfulfilled Lovers," which is probably about us

Qingtong? Can you see it? Can you hear it?

The graduation ceremony was held as scheduled, and everyone's face was adorned with smiles; everything seemed so beautiful.

The news anchor calmly read a passage: "During a support activity for disaster areas involving faculty and staff in the × × region, an incident occurred; a landslide unexpectedly took place, resulting in several teachers encountering misfortune"

My mother was furious and practically jumped out of the kitchen, starting to berate that person: "What kind of eyesight does this person have? My daughter is as beautiful as a flower, is he blind? How could he possibly not be interested in her!" I thought to myself, fortunately, that man is not here; if he were, my mother might have rushed over and given him a good beating.

I continued to remain silent, while she kept talking incessantly

Cheng Qingtong, I miss you very much

After entering the barbershop, I casually found a place to sit down and randomly pointed to a barber to assist me

Perhaps so

We will not kiss, nor will we embrace under the streetlights at midnight like other couples do

To love deeply, even if you are a rat crossing the street, he will still regard you as a treasure; if there is no love, even if you are a beauty that captivates the nation and draws the attention of the masses, in his heart, you are merely a blade of grass

I stretched and smiled at him: "Moxi Yi, it is truly wonderful to have you."

Until one day

The stylist put down the tools in hand and stood in front of me: "Miss, your hair is so long and smooth, are you sure you want to cut it into... a crew cut?"

At that moment, I could hardly make any sound, just sitting in front of you in a daze, not speaking, nor daring to speak, as if afraid that even a slight effort would disrupt your signal. You gave me a faint smile, the same shallow smile as before, familiar yet strange.

After a long while, there was another silence

And the kind of naive infatuation that belongs to youth only happens once

It seems that I have indeed chosen one of the most popular hairstyles for men at present

Even if there is only one, I still want to snatch it over for you

It is the voice that Aunt Ye is familiar with

After graduation, I will be going to the north

Four years ago, someone told me, "If you can wait until that day"

Moxi, I have waited for so many years, and I have finally received your answer

Mom! This person's glasses are almost thicker than the bottom of a beer bottle, and you actually want me to go on a blind date with him! You should consider the next generation; genetics are very important. Besides, I don't like people with such small eyes...

And we have maintained this kind of relationship for a whole year

It was only later that she discovered the wig I was wearing, and then she scolded me thoroughly.

Little Tong, your mother blesses you

Before you left, I tirelessly knitted a pair of gloves for you with yarn, as I heard that wearing gloves knitted by a beloved person would ensnare the wearer and ensure a safe and healthy return to her side

However, ordinary people do not have such a good opportunity, who can blame him for being the president of the student council

Ding Chu, in fact, you are very fortunate. Lin Xiaozhu has not wronged you. You love him, and he has given you the status to love him. Although you eventually parted ways, you have indeed been together with him. You were hurt, but he quickly led you to despair. He did not give you much hope, which is his greatest protection for you.

Is it true that one cannot truly grow without experiencing injury

You placed your hand on my cheek, gently caressing my face with your palm, and leaned down to leave a soft kiss on my forehead

All memories have been reduced to longing. What should I use to change these habits, and how should I spend the years without you by my side

I just found a job, and I had my mother transfer the dry cleaning shop to someone else. As she is getting older, she appears more aged than the average person. For the sake of her health, I arranged for her to stay at home, where she can spend her days tending to flowers and feeding birds, enjoying a leisurely and comfortable life. The salary I earn is sufficient for our frugal living as mother and daughter.

I dealt with my mother, opened the computer, went online, and saw your flashing avatar along with the video request you sent.

The screen flickered for a moment, and your face appeared on the display; I finally saw the complete picture

Moxi, you have lost weight, your cheekbones are more pronounced, and I feel a deep sense of heartache, yet I did not express it.

I raised an eyebrow and then pointed at myself. He was taken aback, and upon hearing a female voice, his mouth instantly dropped wide open: "You are Miss Cheng?"

That moment, I will never forget.

How can you expect me to face the remaining years alone, to bear the unbearable pain of life by myself? Moxi Yi, you said you would come back, yet you have broken your promise, which is not like you at all

He said: "Thank you, Cheng Qingtong"

Hello, is this Qingtong

We often go out together to enjoy snacks, and whenever I see something delicious and fresh, I can't help but smile at you with great delight, and you would gently nudge my head, calling me a foodie

Fearful to the point of being cautious in every action, I extend my antennae to probe the surrounding air for safety, and only when I am certain it is safe do I timidly open my eyes to see what has truly happened

After work that day, I turned on the television as usual. A news report being broadcast caught my attention. Holding an apple in my hand, I absentmindedly took bites while listening to the news report

Cheng Qingtong, wait for me. Once I complete the final relief activity for the disaster area, I will return. After I come back, I will marry you, alright?

Seeing that I had outmaneuvered her, she became less impulsive, and the matter ended without resolution

Until much later, those were the moments I found most difficult to forget

He was elegantly holding a coffee cup, dressed in a black suit, waiting for me

And I have unexpectedly become the only spectator in this theater

Year after year, day after day, I have been waiting for you, and now I am about to see you again, yet you have pronounced a death sentence upon me. You said you would never return.

Once a wonderful word, it now feels like a term that pronounces death

"Cheng Qingtong, will you think of me after I leave?" This is not at all like the kind of question he would ask; it feels sentimental and pretentious, almost as if it were something I would say. Has this fellow been assimilated by me as well?

I can only say that the regrets of youth always hang like a knife, constantly suspended in the heart, and can never be forgotten

He said: "Cheng Qingtong, you are a tenacious trickle, and I, this stubborn rock, am about to be penetrated. What I have said, of course, counts."

My mind is buzzing, unable to calm down

The happiness of that time was sweet to the heart, an unparalleled and ineffable joy. Such intimate actions, such a wonderful you and me

This is probably the only compliment I have heard from him in all these years

If I were truly that remarkable, then why has Moxi never been willing to take a step towards me from the beginning to the end

"Alright, alright! Take a look at this." She picked out a well-built individual from the numerous photos, "Look, this physique surpasses that of Moxi. I heard he works in IT, and in this digital age, IT professionals are in high demand. This one is good; I will call Aunt Liu right away to set up a meeting!"

Noise came through the phone and was transferred to Uncle Ye

It has been proven that having long hair can indeed increase stress; after a haircut, one feels refreshed and invigorated. At this moment, I particularly envy those men who have sported a crew cut since birth; you are truly fortunate

The past is like smoke, like poetry and painting; the years that have gone by are always beautiful

Moxi, have you finally decided to treat me a little better

At that moment, his voice came through the network signal, wave after wave, and I sat on the other side of the computer, nodding vigorously.

If it takes twenty-eight days to form a habit, then my habit has been reinforced through review several hundred times since its formation, and it is likely that I will find it difficult to change it for the rest of my life

I want to laugh, but I am still holding it back: "Aren't you waiting for someone?"

How much time must I spend waiting

A gentle breeze blows, refreshing and comfortable; summer evenings are truly delightful

In this situation, one moment of clarity leads to a continued calmness

Taking half a step forward may be particularly sensitive

It is only when lying alone in bed during the quiet of the night that one tends to indulge in wild thoughts. Is life really going to continue in such a passionless manner?

A tug-of-war, fierce yet heartwarming

Calling out time and again, lamenting repeatedly, you can no longer hear it

I quickly clicked to accept, and then began the long wait. The signal in the mountains is too poor, and I sat in my seat as if on pins and needles, especially wanting to install a receiver or something that could strengthen the signal there. However, being anxious is of no use; I can only wait patiently like this. I have already waited for three years, so what are a few more minutes

Mother, I do not believe, I do not believe that fate can be so cruel as to make us endure so much pain. I do not believe that a girl like Xiao Han should have to accept such a harsh life

In an instant, the memories of the moments we once shared surfaced in my mind

This bald head...

Qingtong, speak honestly, did you not go at all? I will call your Aunt Liu right now

Moxi, during these days of being more than friends but less than lovers, are you happy

Mom ... ... in a tone of playful affection

People will always change; only by adapting can one live better, right? If I had remained like a cold stone, you would probably have long since left my side. If I had always been covered in thorns, I would likely have already fallen into depression by now

Everything is so natural, yet it is incomplete without you, Moxi.

After that, I donned this distinctive head and purchased a set of masculine clothing to go on a blind date

Before leaving, I got a haircut. I only hoped that the person would take a step back upon seeing me and would never want to see me a second time

Everything is just as we once imagined. The graduation hall is magnificent, the graduation stage is vast, the graduation oath is moving, and the farewell at graduation is poignant

Later, my mother no longer went out to talk with the neighbors, nor did she constantly murmur in front of me. She always complied with my wishes in everything, yet the more she did so, the sadder I felt inside

I must say, after imagining it, I almost felt like vomiting myself

While other girls wish for youth to linger and to indulge freely, I hope time can pass more quickly so that you can return sooner

Lin Xiaozhu was kicking her steps, casually chatting with me, rambling on and on, and some of the things she said were even unclear. Strangely, I could understand every sentence. This is probably the result of our mutual understanding; when you say one thing, I already know what the next will be.

You, in that way, are actually quite adorable

Distance is a terrifying thing; even before you left, it filled my heart with fear

Cheng Qingtong!" Mother let out a tremendous roar, "Are you just determined to nitpick? This is the last one, you must meet him. I have already made the appointment for you. He is a good person, comes from a good family, and most importantly, he is also quite handsome. If you don't go to meet him, I will jump off a building today!"

A person is slowly walking towards me, wearing black long pants and a dark green T-shirt, with refreshing hair gently tousled by the wind, revealing a pair of bright eyes

Sometimes, when I see her carefree smile, I feel that everything should proceed in such a natural manner, without the need for change or additional effort

I was taken aback, and my eyes involuntarily became moist

In fact, if this could continue indefinitely, I would not oppose it; I would even be quite happy. Compared to the turmoil of the past, I prefer the tranquility of this moment. Habit is a terrifying thing; once your body or flesh becomes accustomed to something, you will involuntarily carry it out. If you do not complete it, every cell in your body will protest. If it truly reaches this point, it will be the most fatal injury. Habit is a terrifying thing; once your body or flesh becomes accustomed to something, you will involuntarily carry it out. If you do not complete it, every cell in your body will protest. If it truly reaches this point, it will be the most fatal injury.

Once so passionate and full of ambition, now all has turned into a mere illusion, reduced to an ordinary corner in this prosperous world

"Why think of going north? Staying here also offers many opportunities, doesn't it? Besides, your connections are all here."

The train roared and rumbled, yet he still departed, just like that.

I spoke the previous sentence without any hesitation, using my fluent tone and loud voice. It is indeed related to genetics

What assurance is there to speak of, if not relying on the other party's affection for you, allowing for unrestrained behavior

Moxi, after enduring hardships and suffering, you still choose to treat this world with kindness

Afterwards, it became much easier for me to get along with Moxi, and he no longer treated me with a cold demeanor. If I were to reflect on the warmest and sweetest memories of him during these youthful years, it would be this moment.

I smiled and asked him: "Moxi, you once said, 'I never believe in love. If I like you, let's just be friends; perhaps I can wait for that day.' Is it still valid now?"

Aunt, you are not telling the truth, are you..." I asked tentatively

It is actually him, Lin Xiaozhu

Qingtong, do not worry too much. Xiaohan has not woken up yet... I and your aunt will always be by her side, taking care of her... until the very last moment

This passage is devoid of warmth, cold, and unfeeling

Moxi, I have spent three years in such a plain and unremarkable manner, and your occasional phone calls and text messages have become the reason for my endurance. Even now, my phone is filled to the brim with your messages, and I have not been able to bring myself to delete a single one, not even those "mm," "ah," and "oh" that you said.

I diligently searched for numerous job opportunities, but ultimately, only a small company was willing to hire a recent graduate. As I needed to earn money quickly to support my family, I did not hesitate to accept the offer.

You are no longer silent, gently looking at me. This time, I truly see reluctance in your eyes.

You cannot hear my cries, nor can you see my despair; this is perhaps the most heartless thing in this world

In fact, he is quite good; perhaps not as good as Moxi 1. I would truly take blind dating seriously, dress myself up properly, watch a movie with my blind date, spend a few months together, and then get married

I seemed to hear the sound of my own heart shattering, and Ye Bihan's smile kept appearing in my mind, as if playing a movie...

After speaking, my face suddenly felt hot. He looked at my flushed face and reached out to ruffle my hair.

I took off my coat and secretly laughed on the sofa, but accidentally got caught by her

I truly do not wish to say another word, and I turned my head to him and nodded seriously.

Moxi, I see you, and I can also hear your voice

A sigh was heard from over there, and it was evident that the situation did not seem to improve

While we are busy searching for jobs, Mo Xi has the rare opportunity to enjoy some leisure by staying at the school and becoming a teaching assistant. This is a position that many people aspire to attain; working at a school is not only relaxed but also commands respect. The longer one works there, the better the benefits become, so he has certainly struck a good deal.

It is still the same campus, but many familiar faces are gone, and the world has long since changed. Moxi Yi is waiting for me at the school gate, and we chat while taking a walk.

Although I pretended not to care, I was still gently tripped by a stone on the ground. He reached out his hand to support me, and our gazes collided.

I can only feel the rumble of the train gradually fading away, the wind brushing against my face brings an indescribable sense of romance, as if the world is spinning around me

Cheng Qingtong, here, I have thought a lot, with no one to disturb me, and no one to take care of me, yet it allows me to think better. I can be without Xiao Nuan, I can be without tenderness, and I can be without a complete family, but after much contemplation, I realize that I cannot be without you

I let out a slight sigh, reached out my hand, and gently shook hers: "Ding Chu, you look better without makeup; the you without that layer of mask is more authentic." My words had a dual meaning, and she is so intelligent that she must be able to discern it.

My mother wanted to comfort me and held my hand: "Qingtong, people are doing their best, and the heavens are watching over us. Don't lose heart; there are miracles in this world..."

He smiled, this time with a joyful laugh: "Cheng Qingtong, I miss you very much"

On the day I went home, I was wearing a wig, with a sorrowful expression on my face. I said to my mother: "Mom, that person is too handsome, he doesn't even look at me, not once from beginning to end. I might as well not humiliate myself further."

I said with a smile: "What a coincidence, I feel like I haven't gotten tired of my school yet, let's take a stroll together!"

The truth.

However, ever since you appeared, it seems that others are not even one ten-thousandth as good as you. No matter how hard I try, I still cannot bring myself to accept others

On that day, you unexpectedly wanted to have a QQ video call. I hurried home as soon as I got off work, and after rushing in, I sat down in front of the computer. This made my mother think that I had been startled by something, and she kept comforting me, urging me to stay calm and not to rush.

"How could it be you?" I stepped forward. After the last argument, during this meeting, both of us seemed somewhat shy and awkward.

I presented him with a radiant smile

The summer of graduation season is filled with romantic and melancholic hues, making it difficult for one's heart to remain calm. Walking through the campus, one can see scenes of confessions, proposals, farewells, and lamentations everywhere, as the entire campus resembles a small theater

I think Xiaohan must also dislike the way I am now, and every time I think of this, I always feel so sad that I want to cry

Ye Bihan, do you believe that there are still miracles in this world

"Having grown tired of my own school, I came to the neighboring school for a stroll, to enjoy the scenery," he said nonchalantly, as if he were truly just a leisurely person here to admire the views

In fact, connections can be reestablished anywhere, and I am also following my family's arrangements. I also wish to change my environment, which is quite good.

Only a miracle will awaken her

Mom, this bearded man could be my father. Am I getting married or looking for a dad!

After going through so many events, Cheng Qingtong has finally become a coward. She is afraid to face, afraid to endure, and afraid of the cruel outcomes and the bloody reality.

It is evening here, and it should be morning there

"Qingtong, from now on, just smile like this, continue to smile like this, it is the most beautiful. Just like when I first saw you on the bus, so clumsy, so carefree, that version of you is actually very adorable"

Qingtong, in fact, I do not feel guilty at all

This is the scene I used to dream about; walking side by side with him always made my heart race, and my heart was filled with anticipation. I never expected that time would be such a terrifying thing, washing our emotions away to such tranquility

I must say, at this moment, I truly find myself detestable

The following half hour

So you can also speak sweet nothings? I really didn't see that coming

Moxi, do you know how happy I am at this moment

I do not know why I was so naive at that time, to actually believe in such baseless legends, but it was precisely because of you, Moxi, that I believed. I believe in legends, I believe in fairy tales, I believe in you

I stood by with my mouth agape, utterly shocked—Mom, you are too ruthless

He smiled broadly. At that moment, he truly appeared relaxed, as if nothing unpleasant had ever happened before, and we were old friends who had known each other for many years. Perhaps sometimes, letting go is just a fleeting moment, and years later, these things are no longer an issue. They are merely a corner of memory, perhaps even long forgotten.

Is this really the life I desire and the existence I pursue

I have loved too painfully and am too exhausted

Hello! Upon hearing the call being answered, I couldn't wait to speak.

Amidst countless entangled issues, I drifted into a deep sleep. When the morning sun rises, I gaze at the vibrant dawn, shoulder my bag, let out a soft sigh, and continue this monotonous life between two points.

Everything, as we initially envisioned, is just as I anticipated, yet I never expected that I would not be able to graduate with you. Without you on this podium, there is no longer the greatest testament to my youth.

I accompanied you to the station, you were pulling a large suitcase, I lowered my head, and you remained silent. It was not until the train came rumbling along that I suddenly lifted my head and said to you with determination and seriousness: "Moxi Yi, I will wait for your return, you must come back, I will always be waiting for your answer"

I cast a slight dissatisfied glance and turned my head to vomit: "Mom, this person has a fat head and big ears, and at first glance, it is obvious that he has embezzled a considerable amount of state property. Besides, you know I have never liked such overweight individuals; I only like boys like Moxi who appear tall and slim. This, I do not like!"

There is no need for me to elaborate on what happened next; this handsome man was scared away by me

Is it somewhat wasteful to live a life of someone in their eighties at the age of just over twenty?

Now, there are others who ask me to wait

As the New Year approaches, it has been more than two months since you left. I am still diligently working and living, leading a monotonous life of commuting between home and work. My mother is watching this and is almost going crazy. ... The phrase she repeats to me the most every day is: "When is that Moxi coming back? If he doesn't come back, don't wait for him. You are a girl; can you afford to wait? If you keep waiting, you won't be able to get married anymore"

She was stunned: "Not only do I not feel guilty, but I also want to talk to you properly. Since you have no feelings for Lin Xiaozhu, why do you keep provoking him? You provoked him until he fell in love with you, and then you pretended to be Saint Mary, saying that you never loved him at all!"

After my mother knew about this, she never introduced me to blind dates again, but just kept sighing at me, and gradually I got used to it.

I suddenly feel that I am more familiar with your school than my own school... Maybe because I come here too often...

Afterwards, Ding Chu unexpectedly arranged to meet me. Having gone through the events of last time, my understanding of her has deepened significantly, yet I hold no animosity or hatred towards her; it is merely a small issue that has arisen from love.

He laughed heartily: "At that time, I thought you were so silly. Whenever I saw others kissing, you would blush and your heart would race, and I just wanted to tease you a little. I didn't expect that you were not only silly but also quite daft..."

Is it not imperfection that defines youth

I looked at her and felt a sense of familiarity, because I believe that the current Ding Chu is just like the former Cheng Qingtong

Perhaps one day, I will be able to regain my confidence and strive to make some changes, just like Cai Qihang

Have the original wishes and dreams been abandoned just like that

I nodded as a matter of course: "Yes, I am Cheng Qingtong"

Is that so

At this moment, I can only ask you to say fewer words, to have less attachment to me, and it would be best if you could forget me, as that would prevent you from feeling sad

The screen trembles, the signal gradually stabilizes, and in some choppy frames, I see your eyes and hear your voice

I cannot say that it was the longest night of my life, for a lifetime is too long, and I have not yet completed it. I can only say that after enduring that long night, I can no longer face love, nor can I ever love someone in that way again

But why have you not left yet, having chosen to depart

You said that you would take the final step towards me

You are much happier than I am

After my mother saw me hang up the phone, she remained seated on the sofa, motionless. She then stopped going out to chat with others and sat down beside me.

I pursed my lips and smiled, unable to tell whether it was bitterness or self-mockery

Moxi, you see, I have not wronged you. I am merely going to meet this person, and I guarantee that after he sees me, he will not want to meet me a second time. When you return, I will tell you the whole story, and you will surely laugh heartily, then ruffle my hair and say, "Cheng Qingtong, I love you"

Qingtong! Qingtong, do not cry anymore, do not cry anymore... My mother kept telling me not to cry, yet she held me and cried just as sorrowfully as I did

The mood is surprisingly calm, and there is surprisingly little feeling regarding the farewell

It is as if another version of myself has been extracted from my body, leaving only a shell, allowing her to drift in the sunlight, like a living corpse, existing merely to survive.

We often chat late into the night, discussing everything without reservation. Ultimately, our conversations revolve around the peculiar incidents encountered at work today, the number of students who refuse to submit their assignments, and occasionally, we mention Ye Bihan, after which we fall silent and say no more.

I fearlessly walked ninety-nine steps towards you, yet I never considered that the final step would be to send you to heaven

I curled myself up, sinking deeply into the sofa, my gaze hollowly fixed on a point, murmuring to myself

It may be more difficult to keep a secret than to express one's feelings openly

Perhaps it will, perhaps work is too busy, and it may take a long time to think of it once. I deliberately kept him in suspense, but he still forced a smile, seemingly not very satisfied with my answer

Once there were so many dreams, so many fantasies, but in the end, they turned into a mere grain in the vast sea, even smaller than dust

Although my job lacks excitement, I adhere to a punctual schedule, and overtime is a rare occurrence. It is stable and comfortable, requiring little concern, devoid of bothersome bosses, and filled only with endless trivial tasks. There are no scheming colleagues, just endless small talk among coworkers. Life is comfortable, work is comfortable, and my mood is comfortable

There seems to be a kind of emotion that is about to pour out, triggering a landslide

Ultimately, it is still because the love is insufficient

Looking so repulsive that I can't even bear to look at it; having to endure it for a lifetime would be unbearable!

Miracle

After the video call ended, I sat in the chair and laughed foolishly for a long time. When I turned around, I saw my mother, who was also smiling but with tears streaming down her face.

We exchanged a smile.

We also occasionally go to see popular movies that are currently showing, sitting next to you. I often laugh without any restraint, drawing the attention of those in front of us. You would quietly cover your face with your hand, pretending not to know me. But I would deliberately try hard to talk to you, playing pranks on you, and seeing your embarrassed expression makes me want to laugh even more

Do you still remember the first time I saw you on the court? Although you were quite unreasonable, your basketball skills were amazing, which made a group of fans cheer for you. At that time, I didn't have a good impression of you and thought that I would never have any connection with you. Who would have known that you, with your thick skin, tricked me into treating you to a big meal...

When he appeared, my mind was filled with memories of him, both good and bad, all surfacing. After all, I had become an actor in this summer night, no longer just a spectator

However, now that the departure is imminent, everything has become unimportant.

Afterwards, I have been in a state of waiting for him. My spirits have improved a lot. Every day, it seems like he will return the next day. This feeling of happy anticipation makes me feel incredibly fulfilled every day.

Ding Chu, you are unlike me. For a full four years, I have been waiting for someone to take that small step towards me. After four years, he remains in the same place, showing no intention of coming towards me.

"Cheng Qingtong, to speak frankly, I have already broken up with Lin Xiaozhu. There was never any love between us; he was merely with me to try to forget you." She felt somewhat sad, yet her tone still conveyed defiance.

In a state of helplessness, I had no choice but to go

Except for you, Ye Bihan

In fact, the person I met through the blind date is truly remarkable. He has an impressive appearance, deep-set eyes, long eyelashes, and a slightly tanned complexion resembling that of wheat. His hairstyle is the same buzz cut as mine

Not worth mentioning