Chapter 1, The Proctology Department Saves the World

"Insert, have aliens really invaded Earth?" Duke was bewildered, realizing that the words he had spoken were completely absorbed by the black hole, and he heard no sound at all.

Yes, yes, this is profitable, this is profitable

In the endless void, darkness is the most fundamental color, and the chaotic energy surges incessantly, without end. Here, there is no such thing as space, time holds no meaning, there is no direction, nor any sequence.

Time passed unknowingly, and a few light points inevitably collided and came to a stop. Compared to the torrent formed by countless light points, these few clumsy light points were insignificant. However, this seemingly inconspicuous blockage triggered a series of chain reactions, like a domino effect. The entire orderly torrent came to a halt, as if the remote control had been pressed to pause, freezing the scene.

The points of light transitioned from motion to stillness, rubbing and compressing against each other. Each point of light bore the immense pressure brought about by a sudden halt, deforming and on the verge of bursting. Coupled with the chaotic energy that exacerbated the situation, there was a significant tendency for them to collapse into scattered sand. However, there are inherent laws among all things; there is destruction and there is creation. Even in a seemingly doomed situation, there exists a glimmer of hope. The energy generated from the friction of the points of light encountered the overwhelming chaotic energy, converging into an indescribable great force. This great force transformed into a gray lightning bolt, striking towards an inconspicuous soap bubble not far away. Yet, there are inherent laws among all things; there is destruction and there is creation. Even in a seemingly doomed situation, there exists a glimmer of hope. The energy generated from the friction of the points of light encountered the overwhelming chaotic energy, converging into an indescribable great force. This great force transformed into a gray lightning bolt, striking towards an inconspicuous soap bubble not far away.

Reflecting on the helplessness of life, even the toilet light at the boss's house has begun to bully him. Looking up, Duke was stunned. Above him was a pitch-black void; not only was there no toilet light, but even the ceiling was gone, engulfed in darkness. Unlike the night, where even the universe has stars shining, this darkness was pure to the extreme, to the point where even light could be captured and absorbed by it; it was clearly a black hole.

Ranking ahead of Duke are the corpulent head of the proctology department and the deputy director of the Mediterranean, both of whom possess exceptional medical skills, having reached a level where they can barely keep patients alive. Thus, the entire proctology department relies on Duke to avoid financial losses. However, who can blame them for choosing the easy mode in life? These two individuals are respectively the boss's elder and younger maternal uncles, spending their work hours playing cards and their off hours indulging in pleasures. In comparison, Duke is nothing short of a tragedy

Duke vaguely remembers a summer during high school when he had diarrhea and went to the hospital for an IV. In the bathroom, he overheard a conversation between three doctors, and they said the following.

The nurses are adamant that, compared to the proctologist Dr. Du, Dr. Li from the obstetrics and gynecology department is much better! Although he is not handsome, he drives a supercar! Although his medical skills are not impressive, he owns a mansion! Although his physique is average and it is said that his stamina is also lacking, he is the son of the boss! Moreover, it is said that his fingers are very nimble, which adds a touch of shyness to the thought!

Why? ... The little nurses in the entire hospital all know what the situation is in the proctology department. The cute nurses have all expressed that Dr. Du is highly skilled, and when it comes to treating patients, he is considered a master in the field of proctology. However ...! ... But isn't it just too disgusting? It's completely unbearable!

In the face of the gasping soap bubbles, the gray lightning is very satisfied; my harem should be like this, with equal distribution of rain and dew

Aliens opened a wormhole and invaded Earth. I was the first to discover it... Could it be... could the proctology department really save the Earth? The foolish Duke's mind raced with thoughts, and he couldn't help but recall the days of running under the sunset, a memory of his lost youth

Although he is young and accomplished, a gentle insertion is still inappropriate! Although he is somewhat handsome, a gentle insertion is still inappropriate! Although he has a good physique and seems to have decent stamina, a gentle insertion is still inappropriate! In any case, a gentle insertion is simply wrong, there is no chemistry at all, and it is absolutely impossible for there to be any chemistry!

A gray lightning bolt slowly struck within the black hole, and Duke, regaining his senses, hurriedly stood up. However, unexpectedly, his mind was completely unable to control his body at that moment, not even able to move a little finger. Unable to blink, Duke could only watch as the lightning slowly descended upon his head

Who are you trying to fool! Nowadays, who goes out without a mobile phone? Going out without a mobile phone is no different from not wearing clothes! Besides, even without a phone, one can still change numbers and add WeChat. Miss, we can make it, let's add WeChat and chat first

Alright! Duke has finally discovered the greatest enemy of his life, which is his boss. His uncle, his second uncle, his third uncle, and his son, this entire family of his boss is simply a calamity in his destiny, born to bring him misfortune

Only countless colorful orbs, resembling soap bubbles, strive to emit vibrant colors to dispel the ever-encroaching chaos. They are organized yet elusive, combining seamlessly together, with gears rotating and rubbing against each other, akin to a fluid, both real and illusory. These fragile soap bubbles intertwine, huddling together for warmth, resisting the onslaught of chaotic energy, both resilient and precarious, as if they might collapse at any moment.

Having already committed to the field, Duke had no choice but to plead with various connections after graduation, and after much effort, he finally secured a position at a private hospital. Dedicating himself wholeheartedly, he worked tirelessly and without complaint, and by the age of thirty, he had risen to become the third in command in his department, even though there were only three doctors in the entire proctology department

Promotion and salary increase, marrying a beautiful and wealthy woman, waiting for a Mediterranean lifestyle while also suffering from gastroptosis, then he will have finally become the director... After becoming the head of the proctology department, he will again wait for the president to suffer from gastroptosis, at which point he will assume the role of CEO, reaching the pinnacle of his life and dominating proctology... in the medical field! Just thinking about it makes me a little excited!

With a loud bang, the entire hospital shook three times. The medical staff and patients, initially thinking it was an earthquake, soon realized it was just the building trembling slightly. They began to search, only to discover a charred mass in the men's restroom on the second floor.

Indeed, indeed! We chose the wrong profession back in the day!

Truly a cause for celebration, a cause for celebration!

I must have chosen the purgatory mode when I was reincarnated, otherwise, how could it be so difficult to clear the levels

Thus, Duke transformed from his previous laziness, diligently studying every day and ultimately turning the tables to become an academic achiever, successfully gaining admission to medical school. He gritted his teeth and gave up his long-cherished dream of obstetrics and gynecology, resolutely embracing the field of proctology, all for the bright prospects of wealth... Ah, no! It was to save countless lives at its core.

A few days ago, the director was entertaining outside, drinking for seven consecutive days, which successfully led to gastric ptosis and alcohol poisoning. He is still in the emergency room, and when he is brought out, he can only be covered with a white cloth. After three seconds of mourning, Duke became excited. Why? Because the deputy director is about to be promoted to director, which means he will then become the deputy director!

Duke's failures in the workplace have not brought him any success in the dating scene; he remains single to this day. Duke remarked that the sphincter truly causes significant harm. After failing in thirty consecutive blind dates, the initial reactions of the women upon learning he was a doctor were akin to how a dog looks at feces... no, it was more like how a hungry wolf gazes at fresh meat, their eyes gleaming with excitement, eagerly requesting to exchange numbers and add him on WeChat. However, once they discovered he was a proctologist, their attitudes took a complete 180-degree turn. They claimed to be in a hurry, that they hadn't washed their faces, and that they had left their phones at home, thus unable to exchange numbers or add him on WeChat.

Duke, in his despair over arranged marriages, did not expect to find a nurse sister in the hospital; the notion of gaining an advantage by proximity was nonexistent for him

As the saying goes, men fear entering the wrong profession, while women fear marrying the wrong man

On Earth, in Huaguo, XX Province, OO City, in the men's restroom at the end of the second floor of a private hospital, Duke, who is in his twenties and not yet thirty, sits on the toilet, sighing and lamenting how difficult life truly is. Beside him hangs his white coat, with a shiny silver nameplate displaying three prominent characters: Proctology!

That's not right, it's the field of plastic surgery that makes money! Everyone has a desire to be beautiful, and those with a bit of ambition, who wouldn't want to have a few procedures done on their face? With just one surgery, it's not a dream to leave your original partner and marry into a wealthy family! I've heard it can even prolong life, though I don't know if that's true. At the very least, it gives you an advantage in the job market. Let me tell you, making money in plastic surgery is like robbing a bank; we can't envy that!

From this point on, Duke embarked on his unfortunate career in proctology

Afterwards, everything returned to calm! The soap bubbles dared not complain, silently gritting their teeth, entangling once more, beginning to rub against each other for warmth, glowing and radiating heat. Throughout the process, aside from the suffocation of tens of thousands of jokers named "Creator God" and the fright of seven to eight hundred promising youths called "Creator", everything else was fine

It is a pity that fantasies are perfect, while reality is harsh. A sudden bolt from the blue has brought in a deputy director, who happens to be the boss's third uncle

It is evident that the mere integrity of a soap bubble cannot prevent the gray lightning from forcefully advancing. After a symbolic resistance, it was inevitably consumed. The surrounding soap bubbles distanced themselves, expressing their unwillingness to witness such a sordid live broadcast. However, the gray lightning showed no mercy, dispersing like white light through a prism into countless currents so fine that they were imperceptible to the naked eye, spreading across all the soap bubbles. In an instant, the entire chaotic void trembled. The surrounding soap bubbles distanced themselves, expressing their unwillingness to witness such a sordid live broadcast. However, the gray lightning showed no mercy, dispersing like white light through a prism into countless currents so fine that they were imperceptible to the naked eye, spreading across all the soap bubbles. In an instant, the entire chaotic void trembled.

Internal medicine is no longer in demand; dentistry is the most profitable! Nowadays, regardless of age or gender, people are obsessed with food. There is nothing that cannot be eaten, whether it flies in the sky or swims in the water. If one misses a meal, they feel unwell all over. Therefore, to cater to that mouth, people are willing to spend any amount of money

"Wasn't he also inserting when he was seeing the doctor? It's the same act of inserting, so why am I not favored by the girls? My fingers are quite nimble too!" Just as Duke sighed in regret for his past decisions, the light bulb above his head went out.

... ...

Although their voices were very soft, they were still heard "clearly" by Duke, who was all ears. The last doctor's words resonated deeply with him. When you are disconnected from your sphincter, forget about being treated to a lavish banquet by Bingbing; even if aliens invade Earth, I still need to squat for a while first. ... Although diarrhea is treated by gastroenterology, Duke, who can no longer feel his sphincter, stated that the sphincter is clearly a proctology issue ... . ... It is a matter for the colorectal department. The last doctor was right; this is fundamental. Dentistry and plastic surgery are mere illusions and cannot save the world. Although diarrhea is treated by gastroenterology, Duke, who can no longer feel his sphincter, stated that the sphincter is clearly a proctology issue ... . ... It is a matter for the colorectal department. The last doctor was right; this is fundamental. Dentistry and plastic surgery are mere illusions and cannot save the world.

Nonsense! Ophthalmology is the most profitable! This is fundamental, and there are no discounts anywhere in the world

Well, it's a bit awkward