PART 09 You make my heart flutter endlessly

"Precious Pearl, you and Xu Pinxin... don't take it seriously." He added a sentence when he saw my silence

It was Ammer again. I clenched my fist in anger, carrying Lin Fengmian as I squeezed into the car, and said irritably: "Two choices, either go home by yourself or come back with me."

I originally did not care for such an answer, but at what point did I give myself hope

I have forgotten how to smile, the night is not yet cool, but my heart has completely frozen over

He seemed not to have expected that I would actually push him away, get out of the car, and after a moment of daze inside the car, he suddenly started to laugh. This time was definitely radiant with spring light, because I saw his eyes sparkling, as if countless little stars were dancing.

I covered my backside, feeling a sense of despair, and after some thought, I took off my suit jacket and tied it around my waist

I simply decided to let it go and openly accept his daily pick-ups and drop-offs. Cuis said it well; having multiple such outstanding suitors is not a bad thing for me at all

I was suddenly at a loss for words, my hand clenched tightly around my phone in my pocket, my eyes fixed on him without blinking. I did not want to speak, nor did I have the strength to do so. In fact, it seemed that my feelings for him were more than just a fleeting attraction, and this realization filled me with dread.

My heart raced. The temperature in the car was set too high, making me feel flushed. I simply turned my head to look out the window; the scent of lemon was diminished, and my motion sickness symptoms reappeared

Xu Pinxin, drive! My expression must look terrible, with motion sickness combined with anger, my head is spinning in waves.

"Precious Pearl, why not come here and be my assistant!" He suddenly had a whimsical idea and turned his face to gauge my expression

He let out a cold laugh, suddenly turned his head, his eyes dark and deep, abruptly stopped the car, and asked: "Do you like Lin Fengmian?"

He remained silent for a long time before finally speaking: "Cheng Baozhu, do not try to like me. Even if my sexual orientation is not an issue, I still would not like anyone, especially women." His voice was very low, and the wind scattered it, yet I heard it very clearly

I am completely devastated, who said he is cute?! Drunk, his words are just as venomous!

"Give me a chance, and I will prove that he is not as good as you think."

Xu Pinxin suddenly straightened his back, laughing with great joy: "Would he care about such a trivial job at Huafeng? Bazhu, he prefers men, doesn't he?"

He turned his head to look at me, frowned slightly, glanced at the road conditions in front of the car, and suddenly leaned down to pull the seatbelt from the passenger seat, stating seriously: "Cheng Baozhu, you must wear a seatbelt when riding in a car in the future; otherwise, you should not ride in someone else's car"

I let out a long sigh, unable to bring myself to issue him a fine, and could only sit back down again

Perhaps, after some time, I will realize that this is merely an illusion. Alternatively, I may find that I must leave

I went, what should I do about accommodation? I rubbed my head, the more I tried to avoid it, the closer I got. I am afraid that I might really be unable to resist making some inappropriate moves

"You look unwell, are you carsick?" He skillfully turned the corner and pinched the web of my hand.

I pushed open the car door and stepped out

I am aware that my dark circles are prominent, and I also know that my skin is pale. The sleepless nights over the past few days have left me looking extremely haggard. This is because I have realized that I am beginning to lose control over my emotions. When I close my eyes, all I see is the gentle smile of a certain Lin.

"Whether you drive or not is none of my business, and whether I like Lin Fengmian is none of your concern!" I pried open the car door and quickly dashed out. Finally, looking down from above, I slapped the car door and said to him, "Xu Pinxin, do not come to pick me up anymore. I cannot ride in your private car; it makes me feel suffocated and breathless."

I looked up at Lin Fengmian behind the table, his gaze flickering, avoiding mine

Xu Pinxin's car slowly glided, made a turn, and suddenly drove against the traffic, moving slowly behind me along the sidewalk. The window was half open, and he leaned out, saying in a flattering tone: "Baozhu, would you like to get in? I will take you home"

"Okay, I will text you when I get back, taxi." I extended my hand and waved it backward, and as it fell, I conveniently hailed a taxi. Without looking back, I got into the car and said to the driver: "Shanghai Road, please drive fast."

"Give me a call when you get home." Lin Fengmian's voice was surprisingly gentle, so gentle that it made me want to turn around and look at him

"Are you going to the Baozhu exhibition in Yangzhou?" Xu Pinxin asked while steering the wheel.

I was astonished, staring wide-eyed at Xu Pinxin, my heart leaping with joy, a hint of secret delight. Could it be that I am special to Lin Fengmian?

These days have been truly complicated

Or rather, does he like you? Seeing that I have not responded for a long time, his face moved even closer.

I felt increasingly embarrassed, pushing his hand away, and said: "Drive first, we can't be stuck here all the time." I am not accustomed to being insulted in such a manner

He slightly pulled away from me, tilted his head to look at me, and suddenly clapped his hands and laughed: "Ammer was right, my subconscious indeed leans towards the same sex; the women I find pleasing to the eye look no different from men."

I am at a loss for words. What kind of fiend is Comrade Zheng Mo, misleading others is a grave sin

I cleared my throat and said: "Once upon a time, there was a loaf of bread that suddenly felt hungry while walking down the road, so it ate itself." I was in fits of laughter, watching Lin Fengmian as I laughed. It was so funny, Lin Fengmian, if you don't laugh, you'll look like a fool. I silently condemned him with my gaze.

Further ahead is a crossroads; if you wish to avoid a ticket, you may turn into the alley in front.

"Cheng Baozhu, will you try to accept me? I might be more suitable for you than Lin Fengmian." Xu Pinxin's voice was not loud, but I could hear it clearly.

Lin Fengmian was taken aback for a moment, then suddenly laughed and said: "Amo is an authority, of course he would not mislead others. Cheng Baozhu, you are just angry out of shame!"

Lin Fengmian finally lifted her head completely, slightly furrowing her brow. Upon seeing A May's strange, hidden smile, her eyes swept across my face. She cleared her throat and asked, "What about those small inns?"

He lowered his body, his eyes meeting mine, and the smile at the corners of his lips grew increasingly radiant; however, I knew that the smile did not reach his eyes

I don't know! Ah May responded quickly, and soon added in a low voice, "I estimate there isn't any left either"

"Cheng Baozhu, I have truly found myself liking you more and more!" He slowly rolled down the car window and shouted at me. Just as I had crossed over the railing on the road, hearing his shout made my legs tremble, and in a moment of clumsiness, I accidentally tore off the pocket from my backside.

Since that day, Lin Fengmian and I fell into a strange and awkward atmosphere. He respected me a foot, and I returned the respect with a yard. To outsiders, our relationship seemed to be advancing by leaps and bounds, and we appeared to get along exceptionally well. However, in my view, it was as if there was a piece of crystal-clear glass between us; we could interact intimately, yet there was always a lack of warmth.

This fellow is indeed very willful

I was speechless, locking eyes with him for three seconds. For someone so willful, I do not expect to persuade him against doing certain things. Therefore, it is better to save my breath and go upstairs to rest

The venue in Yangzhou does not provide accommodation. "Ah May" stuck out her tongue and spoke cautiously

He glanced at me sideways, his eyes full of laughter. He took out his phone from his pocket, skillfully pressed the keys, and then said into the phone, "Ammer, come pick me up, I am at ... ... " He raised his head, took a deep breath towards the empty street, and added, "On the street behind Yipin Building." After putting away his phone, he smiled at me with his eyes turning into two immature crescent moons.

He was laughing heartily when suddenly he frowned, covered his mouth, and began to gag

However, that fleeting sense of joy vanished in an instant; I am still not adept at self-hypnosis. His feelings towards me are not of affection, but merely a passing glance, not dislike at best. Remembering what he said that night, my heart aches.

No. Two voices sounded simultaneously

Who are Lin Fengmian and Zheng Mo? I know I have no right to ask such a personal question, but I just can't help it

His quick response elicited a light laugh from him

Xu Pinxin has indeed been quite active these past few days; apart from work and sleep, he has been relentlessly occupying my free time without a moment's respite.

Well, there are many things on my mind. I quickly brushed over it, not wanting to say much more

Lin Fengmian's eyes stared directly at me, the pitch-black pupils cold and eerie, the teeth in his mouth making a grinding sound, as if his teeth had worn down a level since encountering me

I looked up in surprise at him. Could it be that Lin Fengmian's secret of being a gay man is a secret that everyone knows?

I simply waved away the taxi, making an effort to keep myself calm and composed

The key issue is that hotels are difficult to book; I could only secure one. A May tried hard to suppress her smile, and to convey authenticity, she widened her eyes and held up the black folder in her hand. "Yangzhou is currently hosting the Huazhong Festival, and all the hotels are fully booked."

I wearily leaned against the passenger seat and nodded at him, saying: "Manager Lin said there are no other candidates, it seems I must go."

I simply turned around and listened to him speak from about fifty meters away

He silently looked at me, speechless for a long while. I innocently looked back, these jokes are clearly very funny, and I laugh to the point of tears every time I see them

"So funny, Lin Fengmian, of course I wouldn't like you." The wind picked up a bit more, causing my hair to fly everywhere. I flicked my short hair and laughed freely, though my face stiffened for a moment. "What I like is Xu Pinxin." As soon as the words left my mouth, I almost slapped myself; was there something wrong with my nerves? Xu Pinxin and I were hardly familiar, I lamented inwardly.

His feet were dangling, his head resting low against my chest, his eyelids drooping, clinging to me in a spoiled manner: "I don't know the way, you should call Amer to pick me up"

Lin Fengmian, spit it out for me

"Precious Pearl, if you don't come up, I will keep following you." He honked the horn thunderously, paying no attention to the traffic police at the intersection

He looked at me with disgust, opened my hand, and shouted loudly: "How filthy, disgusting, and lacking in dignity!"

"Change to someone else, he won't truly pursue you." His face was filled with pity, and perhaps there was also a hidden pain in his eyes. I refused to look deeper. Cheng Baozhu, do you really want to make yourself even more embarrassed?

"Ah May, is there something?" I put down what I was holding and walked over. Among all my colleagues, she is the most innocent, yet this young girl has never given up on the idea of pairing Lin Fengmian and me together.

"What about you, Baozhu, do you like him?" After going around in circles, he returned to this topic again

Alright, I admit defeat; it was my mistake to engage in such profound discussions with a drunkard

This will not do. After some thought, I leaned closer, steadying his chin with one hand while extending my index finger with the other, inserting it into his mouth and pressing down on the root of his tongue

Ah? This kid looks so cute when he's drunk! I couldn't help but pinch his waist again, muttering to myself: "Lin Fengmian, why are you a GAY?"

We will talk about it then. Lin Fengmian tapped his index finger on the glass panel, slightly raised his chin, indicating that Ah May could leave.

The car horn outside the window sounded in unison. I glanced over and saw Xu Pinxin had stopped the car in the middle of the road, leaving the vehicles behind unable to move forward or backward, quickly creating a long traffic jam.

As soon as A May spoke, she was startled, shrank her neck, made a gesture of encouragement towards me, and quickly darted out.

"Lin Fengmian, I suspect you are not drunk." My eyes sparkled. Under the moonlight, a small lotus flower bloomed at the corner of Lin Fengmian's lips

Thank you, really don't come to pick me up tomorrow. I bent down, my face contorted in pain, and said, "Mr. Xu, I get car sick; riding in your car feels like self-torture."

Because he only regards me as a subordinate

"What does it have to do with you? Lin, Jing, Li!" My face burned with embarrassment, and my heart ached; I wished I were the one who was drunk. "I'm leaving. If you are not drunk, then I won't keep you company." I ran my fingers through my short hair, my words lacking strength. I turned away, my eyes cast down to the ground, not daring to look at Lin Fengmian.

I was at a loss for words, what image is there to maintain at this moment? So I angrily asked him: "Lin Fengmian, don't you feel uncomfortable like this? What does image even matter!"

I remember he said that he only has a favorable impression, and the main reason is that I look like a boy

His eyes glimmered as he smiled mischievously and said, "Alright, let's not mention that. However, to my knowledge, Lin Fengmian has never engaged in private interactions with women, let alone hire a female assistant to be by his side, yet he would come to warn me about you"

Under the moonlight, Lin Fengmian's face was exceptionally bright. Upon hearing my question, she suddenly burst into laughter, tilting her head with a hint of childlike playfulness. Looking down from above, she pressed her index finger to her lips and said, "Zheng Mo is just Zheng Mo." Her expression was both charming and innocent

"Just for a moment, let me determine whether I should provoke you..." His voice became deeper, carrying a seductive tone, his long eyelashes fluttering, while his lips leaned in on their own.

Indeed not, I said. But damn it, I acted like a lovesick girl

The wind blew from all directions, causing Lin Fengmian's hair to flutter incessantly

I remain silent, tilting my head in contemplation, unsure of how to respond

I followed along with a dry laugh; in this situation, there is an idiom that can describe it, which is "laughing in anger and urgency"

"Lin Fengmian, what do I mean to you?" I asked him, pointing at myself. My sixth sense told me that he had a subtle fondness for me that was different from his feelings for others. Could it be that I am also a man?

He does not like me, he will not like me. I answered quickly, my mind racing, considering my response, "What he likes is his work"

Suddenly, he leaned against the wall, pounding it with laughter, and said: "Cheng Baozhu, you are simply driving me crazy! Driving me crazy!"

"Mr. Xu..." As soon as I opened my mouth, he shot me a fierce glare, and I immediately changed my words, "Pinxin, why did you stop? The traffic behind is all jammed up"

Having had their fill of food and drink, Lin Fengmian's face was as red as a monkey's bottom. The clients from Shandong can indeed drink a lot. Once the guests had dispersed, he slumped in his seat and gritted his teeth at me, saying: "Cheng Baozhu, what on earth were you talking about today!"

"I hailed a taxi, are you going home by yourself?" I asked as I stopped a taxi.

I leaned against the door of the taxi, wanting to respond to his smile, but I found that I could not smile.

"Alright, let it all go." I smiled at him, grinning happily.

"Let me make a bet with you, Cheng Baozhu. If I lose, I will no longer bother you and will instead help you get together with Lin Fengmian. If you lose, you will give me a chance, alright?" He then simply pushed open the car door and stepped out.

"Because I do not like women," he mumbled as he rested his head on my shoulder

"Then come back in the evening." Lin Fengmian's pen slipped from her hand and fell onto the glass tabletop, startling Ah May, whose hand trembled slightly. After a moment, she managed to force a smile and said, "Manager Lin, the exhibition will last for two days."

He is so kind to you that it is unexpected..." he murmured, as if speaking to himself

He gazed at me intently, and suddenly gave me a faint smile, very slight yet incredibly warm. He slowly said, "Because I will worry." His eyes shimmered with warmth as he smiled at me, casually checking to see if the seatbelt was fastened securely.

Of course! His tongue began to twist, "Zheng Mo prepared a remedy for me to sober up, usually there's no need to vomit, but today I forgot to take the powdered white foxtail before hand."

Behind me are my self-esteem and the love that has just begun to blossom, as I turn around, I fear that my tears will flow profusely

I straightened my back and said quickly: "Of course not!"

Manager Lin, I can choose not to go. I stood behind Ah May and lowered my voice. I did not want to get in deeper; if it were not for the need for a job to make ends meet, I would keep my distance from him.

"If you don't come up, I won't go in." He smiled at me, pointing at the alley ahead, as innocent as an unblemished young man

He surprisingly no longer insisted, nodded slightly at me, and smiled radiantly: "Baozhu, let's walk together tomorrow."

It is not without reason; my numbed sixth sense tells me that Xu Pinxin and Lin Fengmian harbor mutual disdain for each other, and there must be a reason for this that I am unaware of

Most importantly, I dislike riding in a car with arrogant individuals

"Well, there are still some questions regarding the exhibition on Saturday," said Ah May, holding a large folder, smiling oddly, her gaze constantly scanning between me and Lin Fengmian

I stared blankly at his hand, unconsciously muttering to myself: "Can this prevent motion sickness? Lin Fengmian has also helped me with this before"

"Lin Fengmian, are you feeling nauseous?" I saw his face turn from red to white, his expression filled with great pain

I looked at him expressionlessly and shook my head: "You lost, just tell me, why do you hate Lin Fengmian so much"

"Cheng Baozhu, if you don't go, who will? Are we really going to let Hu Xiaomao go?" He lowered his head, took out a calculator from the desk, and while calculating, he mumbled to himself.

He saw me sit back down, his face lighting up with a smile, and he casually fastened my seatbelt before making a turn into the alley

I glanced at him and truly did not understand why he gritted his teeth so fiercely when mentioning Lin Fengmian

I glared at him, covered my backside, and continued walking forward

He withdrew his gaze thoughtfully and began to drive with utmost concentration

I was at a loss for words, supporting him as we walked outside, while cautiously asking, "Manager Lin, is my joke not funny?"

No, I do not like changing jobs. I pouted and still replied

His brows furrowed tighter and tighter, his hand pressed against his chest, his complexion pale, and he lacked even the strength to respond.

"Did I not say we would discuss it later? I will take care of the house issue." His eyes scanned my face and suddenly asked, "Cheng Baozhu, did you not sleep well? You look so unenergetic!"

My footsteps paused briefly, stopping at the security door at the entrance of the stairs

He was momentarily taken aback, then smiled and said, "Alright, I promise you."

I also squatted down and gently said to him: "Lin Fengmian, getting drunk without vomiting is harmful to your health"

I also stood up and approached him, saying: "Lin Fengmian, I will support you." I deliberately ignored the glare he gave me and placed his arm around my shoulder.

While hitting my hand, he retched and cursed, "Cheng Baozhu, you crazy woman!" He stood up, swaying unsteadily.

Is it a temporary confusion

"Cheng Baozhu, have I ever said that I was drunk?" Seeing the strong implication of my accusation, he simply crossed his arms and started chatting with me.

Because I cannot bear to part with you, Manager Lin

I also smiled along with him, feeling the skin at the corners of my lips twitch, and asked, "What about the content of the bet?"

"If you don't like Lin Fengmian, just kiss me once, and then I'll believe you." He laughed mischievously, his smug expression resembling that of a little boy who has caught someone in a compromising situation, "Otherwise, I won't drive."

The car sped along swiftly, and I rolled down the window to its lowest point, the wind rushing in and leaving me breathless. So be it, let it be stifled from its very inception! Yet, it is merely a budding thought; why does my heart ache so faintly? The wind is too fierce, and in the end, I find myself in tears.

I remained silent, my face stiff, and after a long while, I finally squeezed out a word through my clenched teeth: "No"

He laughed while dodging, placing his hand on my face, and said in a vague manner: "It’s very itchy, I don’t like it." His tone carried a hint of playfulness, somewhat like a big boy.

"Overthinking is of no benefit," his eyes were filled with complexity, which I could not comprehend. "Some things should be let go of when the time comes."

I am also a person with self-respect; even if my heart is burning with anguish, on the surface, I must remain unperturbed.

What kind of logic is this, not liking women equals being GAY? I am astonished, this child, could it be that he has been misunderstanding himself for a long time? I patted his face and asked seriously: "Not liking women does not necessarily mean being GAY, who has misled you like this?"

"Ammer said, my sexual orientation, subconsciously leans towards the same sex..." He frowned in thought, his expression innocent and naive, with shallow dimples flashing, very adorable

Damn it, get lost! I finally exploded; these pants are work clothes, can I not even make a living? There's a hole hanging on my backside, how am I supposed to go to work tomorrow?

"What is it? Tell me about it." He had a look of disbelief on his face

"Saying it is equivalent to not saying it at all." I indignantly pinched his waist, which was slender and seemed well-maintained

While speaking, he loosened the seatbelt on his body and leaned towards me

Did you never throw up before? I am quite curious; to drink like this without throwing up is truly impressive

"I know this, isn't it about booking a hotel?" Lin Fengmian lowered her head, scribbling with her hand.

The heart shattered into fragments in an instant

I inadvertently invested my emotions into it

The investment in two relationships has led me to doubt my sixth sense. Now, I can no longer distinguish between what is considered affection and what is merely ambiguity

I do not know. I shook my head and replied to him with an air of indifference, "He is just my superior; a good employee does not discuss the privacy of their boss"

The moonlight was obscured by clouds, and Lin Fengmian's smile gradually faded under my gaze. His arm gently lowered, and he awkwardly slipped his hand into his pants pocket. His eyes began to avoid mine, flickering and blinking rapidly.

Oh. I somewhat understand, who is Zheng Mo? Could it be the Mo mentioned on the phone before? I couldn't help but glance at Lin Fengmian, feeling unusually strange, a bit jealous, and somewhat sour.

In fact, I had an even funnier story that I didn't get to share, and you interrupted me. I sighed innocently

In the blink of an eye, nine days have passed, and there are three days left until the exhibition

I rubbed my head and said through gritted teeth: "Lin Fengmian, who on earth is that Amor? He is misleading you. What nonsense is this about not loving women means loving men? There is no such reasoning!"

Until downstairs at the Tsui family home

"Cheng Baozhu, please do not look at me like that." Lin Fengmian suddenly burst into laughter, her eyes reflecting the moonlight, bright and shimmering, with a hint of light amidst the darkness, quite enchanting. "The way you are acting will make me think you are confessing your feelings," he said slowly. Although he was laughing, his tone began to grow serious.

With a snap, I unfastened my seatbelt, pushed him away, and said with my eyes closed: "Xu Pinxin, I get motion sickness and I'm short of breath, don't come so close." I was speaking the truth; it was just a kiss, nothing serious. However, I, Cheng Baozhu, simply do not like being forced to do things by others.

Why? I rolled my eyes. I was in Lin Fengmian's car, and it seemed like he was the one who fastened my seatbelt, though it cannot be ruled out that he was aware of his poor driving skills.

"Precious Pearl, remember to wait for me tomorrow so we can walk together." He raised his voice when he saw that I was ignoring him. I opened the security door, then silently closed it again, shutting his voice out from the floor.

Manager Lin peered out from the doorway, a small head emerging, with large, round eyes that darted about restlessly

"I won't spit it out." He squatted down, pouted his lips, and desperately swallowed, "I absolutely will not spit it out."

I gritted my teeth, beginning to feel an inexplicable anger, and the insults that followed troubled my heart

I cannot help but roll my eyes; he is indeed a willful person. I have wasted so much breath speaking to him seriously.

"You need to turn into the alley, otherwise we will get a ticket soon!" I finally couldn't help but responded to him.

The horn behind was pressed even louder, mixed with the driver's profanity

He shrugged, smiled at me mischievously, and nonchalantly said, "I haven't thought it through yet, I'll let you know once I do, okay?"

"What is the problem?" Lin Fengmian finally lifted his head from behind the desk, frowning. Recently, he had been quite irritable, and a large sore had developed at the corner of his mouth.