Chapter 3, The Irretrievable Youthful Times

You are truly impressive! I used to think that you really cared about me! I was a bit touched at first, but who knew your acting skills could easily win ten Golden Horse Awards. What are you going abroad for? You might as well go make a movie!

I ... ... I haven't told her ... ... Perhaps I was wrong about this matter, and my voice became as small as a mosquito

It is what I told the teacher and your mother

In the past, the name "Ye Mubei" was merely a piece of idle gossip from my classmates, and I always chose to filter it selectively; I would forget it after hearing it once, or even turn around and walk away.

At this moment, the house is unusually quiet. I called out several times, but no one responded; it seems as if everyone in the house had made plans to go see the circus performance, leaving me all alone.

Pushing open the door, a mist enveloped the night, and the streetlights cast a faint glow. I saw Ye Mubei sitting on a motorcycle, his expression unclear, with a person hanging from him; it was needless to say, it must be Lin Xiaoyu.

What is the result

I glanced at Lu Wei and was nearly fainted by the gash on his face.

I would like to persuade her myself first, trying to move her.

When a person's life is reduced to dull textbooks, becoming a stagnant pool under the overcast sky, Ye Mubei's deeds can always, like lightning, tear through that oppressive darkness with a brief flash of brilliance

Why do you want to do this

Ignoring my dissatisfaction, Ye Mubei walked over, took Xiaoyu's hand, helped her up, and then shook his head at me, saying: "What she wants to do is her freedom; I'm not her father, so why should I interfere? Besides, she is no longer a three-year-old child, right?"

His words struck me like a sword, piercing right through me. I cannot deny that what he said is true, yet I still detest this version of myself from the bottom of my heart, this excessively weak self, this self that is of no use.

After clearly hearing what she said, I felt as if I had fallen into a waterfall, with the sound of rushing water filling my mind, and all my strength vanished in that moment

How did things come to this point

"Your mother went to see the homeroom teacher last Thursday, didn't she? It was I who informed Teacher Zhou. In fact, all those personal and sick leaves I requested for you were merely to cover for your truancy!" Lu Wei calmly uttered these cruel words, as if a newscaster was reporting on a recently occurred event.

Lu Wei, why are you here... I am really so angry! If it weren't for her telling the teacher and my mom about this, how could I have been beaten by my mom?

I turned my face away, tightly closed my eyes, not knowing where this slap would land next

Seeing her raise her hand to cover her mouth, my heart suddenly tightened, and I quickly shouted into the room: "Aunt Chen, come help!"

If it were Ye Mubei, what would he do? It seems that there is nothing in this world that could cause him concern, nor is there anything that could bind him. He should be sitting on his Harley, looking indifferent as everything unfolds. I think he would actually relish the chaos in the world!

I do not know what was wrong with what I said, but her expression was exactly the same as when she slapped me that day

I truly do not understand why things have turned out this way today

Opening my eyes, I realized that this was not an illusion. Lu Wei was standing among us, grasping the raised hand of Xiao Yu, his expression dark.

A few seconds later, heavy and hurried footsteps came from upstairs

The streets began to bustle early, with various glimmering private cars whizzing past us.

Indeed, the headlights of the Harley illuminated the flowerbed ahead, and two figures could be faintly seen seated on the motorcycle

Perhaps it was my candid words that hurt her I looked up at Lu Wei and thought that my expression must have looked as if I was about to cry

I stood near the entrance, holding a heavy backpack in my hand, suddenly feeling a bit at a loss.

The heart feels as if it has been struck heavily by something, even breathing has become painful. I cannot become Lin Xiaoyu, nor can she become me.

How do you plan to handle this? I raised my head and looked at his expression of facing death with courage, feeling somewhat worried

I have told her and advised her, but...

In fact, ever since that day when we parted on bad terms, Lin Xiaoyu has started to avoid me, just like the same poles of two magnets. When I return home, she either storms out or shuts herself in her room.

Of course not! Why must you think so poorly of me? What you choose to do is your own freedom, but you should also consider the feelings of others. Every time you stay out all night, Aunt Chen and I worry about you.

I suddenly recalled a cat I encountered a long time ago. The more I tried to approach it, the more wary it became. No matter how I waved the small fish treats in my hand or called to it in a gentle voice, it still regarded me as an enemy, hissing, bristling its fur, glaring at me as it backed away, and then hiding in the gap between the cabinets, refusing to come out again

Is there still a need to ask this question? I simply cannot allow myself to watch you fall any further! If you continue down this path, not only will the academy abandon you, but I will also be disappointed in you!

However, just recently, his name has begun to appear frequently in my life. Whether it is a coincidence or something else, as I walk through the corridor holding a stack of books, or during my lunch break eating a bento on the grass, I can unintentionally hear some voices about him, such as—

Do you think I would believe your nonsense? I have already told you, mind your own business regarding my matters

I attempted to break this suffocating silence and delve into the topic

As usual, in pursuit of those honors, I must return to my room and spread out my textbooks to diligently memorize vocabulary.

I can hardly bear to look at her face, as if the world would collapse if I did not nod in agreement

After a while, the bird finally flew away, and I suddenly recalled the image of Xiaoyu shouting at me, causing my cheeks to involuntarily flush again

However, the stronger the light, the darker the shadows it casts

Lin Xiaoyu lay there, shifting her body slightly, as if she had awakened

So you hope that I get beaten up by my mother and then receive a warning from the school

Are you alright? Haven't you woken up yet? I have called you several times!

"You... you were the one who got her drunk, weren't you?" Looking at Xiaoyu in this state, I couldn't help but feel a sense of dread. I raised my head and glared at Ye Mubei, loudly questioning, "Couldn't you have at least reminded her to exercise some restraint? How dangerous could this be!"

Lu Wei was momentarily taken aback, then gently patted my shoulder and said, "The world is so vast, there must be someone who can influence her, but that person will not be you"

"Alright..." Finally unable to withstand her repeated pleas, I weakly responded, lacking any conviction, to the point that I didn't even know how to write the word "alright". I suddenly felt an immense weight on my shoulders, but how could I bear to say, like Ye Mubei, with a carefree expression, "I'm sorry, this matter has nothing to do with me; what she wants to do is her freedom." At the very least, I cannot hurt Aunt Chen's feelings; she has already sacrificed too much for me and Xiaoyu. I suddenly felt an immense weight on my shoulders, but how could I bear to say, like Ye Mubei, with a carefree expression, "I'm sorry, this matter has nothing to do with me; what she wants to do is her freedom." At the very least, I cannot hurt Aunt Chen's feelings; she has already sacrificed too much for me and Xiaoyu.

You know.

I do not have the confidence to successfully bring her to the academy

"She is drunk." Ye Mubei looked at me, a faint smile appearing at the corner of his lips, "It's just a few glasses of beer."

What are you doing

No longer possessing her former boldness, she, with dark circles under her eyes and silent demeanor, appears as if a part of her soul has been drawn away

A sense of helplessness surged like a tide, enveloping my body

Skipping classes and racing cars are probably just a part of Ye Mubei's daily life. It was only later that I learned Ye Mubei had owned his first Harley motorcycle at a very young age. This made me realize belatedly that his starting point was always much higher than that of others

Xiaoyu opened her mouth wide, as if she had swallowed an egg. She was stunned for a long time before weakly saying, "You are lying!"

Do you take me for a fool? Just ask any classmate, they all know it was the homeroom teacher who asked you to call my mother, right? You, such a eager and good student, since you agreed, why not say a word to my mother? Don't make me laugh to death!

I felt as if I had been electrocuted, quickly stepping back two paces, and then instinctively raising my hand to shield my cheek.

In my impression, Lu Wei, who would help Xiaoyu prepare for every holiday, like a gentle big brother, how could he suddenly overturn everything he has done?

On this night, I had many chaotic dreams, and in many of them, there was the figure of Ye Mubei

It is frightening, yet very effective. Xiaoyu seemed to have been stung hard by a scorpion, and I saw disappointment in her dim eyes.

"Does it hurt? The injuries on your body?" Seeing her covering her cheek and hugging her arms all the way, I cautiously asked.

I searched desperately for a topic, but unfortunately, Xiaoyu clearly had no intention of cooperating with me. It was like playing tennis; every ball I sent over, she would always hit it back fiercely, while I could never manage to return it.

Is a quiet and simple life really that difficult to achieve

"Does she really think I can endlessly help her get leave?" Lu Wei's face was filled with a sense of helplessness, as if he were lamenting the failure to turn iron into steel. "Does she know that exceeding a certain number of absences will lead to expulsion?"

I merely want to touch its head and scratch its chin

The door opened with a soft click, and Aunt Chen walked into the living room. Seeing me sitting alone, she couldn't help but pause for a moment and gently asked, "Xing An, you are back? Would you like something to drink? Red tea, milk, or coffee?"

"Does Ye Mubei often speed?" I asked

I... I gave her a difficult and awkward smile, cautiously glancing at Lin Xiaoyu. She showed no reaction, merely turning her head and gazing out the door with a vacant expression.

Looking at his expression, so gentle and composed, I felt like a little dog unable to find its den, both anxious and frustrated. His words finally calmed me down a bit. In the end, I sighed and said slowly: "Lu Wei, you are always so good. I really cannot imagine what this home would become without you, and what would happen to Xiao Yu..."

My expression was almost as shocked as Xiaoyu's

It was as if I had been enchanted; my gaze and my thoughts involuntarily followed in his footsteps

Lin Xiaoyu and I walked side by side, the morning sunlight shimmering on the green space where the water truck had passed, the scattered light falling on her newly dyed burgundy curls

Suddenly catching sight of a red and swollen handprint on Lin Xiaoyu's face, I couldn't help but let out a small gasp of shock

It seems that Lu Wei has really hurt her

Aunt Chen did not go to find the homeroom teacher? Lu Wei inhaled sharply.

The strong smell of alcohol wafted through the air, accompanied by a hint of sourness. Lin Xiaoyu lowered her head, her face buried in the shadows, burping from the alcohol, appearing to be barely conscious.

All my drowsiness was chased away by this sound, and I hurriedly put on a blue hoodie and dashed down the stairs. Even I was surprised by my astonishing reaction speed

I wonder why people who originally walked on the same path would choose to part ways

"These words are not for you to say yet..." Lin Xiaoyu interrupted me, her face contorted, and her angry gaze pierced through me like a dagger

I turned on the desk lamp and took out my textbook from my backpack, but I couldn't read a single word

Seeing Xiaoyu again, it was a little past 8 o'clock in the morning. She and Aunt Chen were standing at the door waiting for me, both with their hands hanging down and their expressions terrifyingly solemn

I am just ... ...

I was completely bewildered by her sudden and overwhelming accusations

Standing in the corridor and looking outside, on the playground, several lower-grade students playing football are gathered together drinking mineral water. In the distance, under the dark clouds, a cluster of tall buildings is shrouded in morning mist, gray and hazy, just like our current mood

Did Xiao A not come to class today

I offered him a weary smile, spread my hands, indicating that I had nothing to say

Lu Wei is always so reliable; I can always sense a comforting presence from him. Even if the sky were to fall, he would use the strength of his arms to support it

After a brief silence, she suddenly erupted, like a cat whose tail has been stepped on, shaking off my hand and glaring at me with anger

"Xing An, I beg you, I cannot watch over her all the time, nor can I chain her up. I can only rely on you, is that alright?" Aunt Chen grasped my hand, pleading once more, her palm was drenched in sweat

Xiaoyu, please do not be so angry. Trust me, I actually haven't told Aunt Chen that the homeroom teacher wants to see her. Otherwise, why would I have specifically gone to find you that day? I just hoped that we could settle things with the teacher before Aunt Chen finds out!

The scenery along the street continuously rushes past, leaving only the monotonous sound of footsteps in my world

Looking at Lu Wei's resolute profile, I do not know why, an unruly figure suddenly jumped into my mind, that dangerous person who is completely opposite to Lu Wei—Ye Mubei

Does she really hate attending classes that much? I truly do not understand what those delinquents have instilled in her mind? Lu Wei rubbed his temples and glanced at me with frustration, asking, "What is she really thinking? Does she truly not want to go to school anymore?"

I looked up and saw Xie Yu coming down from upstairs. She gathered her messy hair at the back of her head and tied it up high with a rubber band, turning her body as she brushed past me.

Life is as dull as a stagnant pool, how I wish it could stir up a little ripple

I want to say, she has already cried

I stared blankly at her hurried figure, recalling that she was once the closest girlfriend to me, as if something had dug a hole in my heart, leaving it feeling empty

"Do not worry about her anymore, I will take care of it," he said, taking a deep breath as if he had made a significant resolution

Lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling, I pondered for a long time about Lin Xiaoyu's dazed appearance under the influence of alcohol and Ye Mubei's indifferent expression. I contemplated why this world has become increasingly difficult to understand and more restless

I looked up at Aunt Chen; her eyes were red-rimmed, and her usually neat and tidy hair bun was somewhat disheveled. Her haggard and pale face made her appear as if she had aged two years in an instant

Xiaoyu used an increasingly severe indifference, even with a hint of sorrow and anger in her eyes, to create distance between us, and then she disappeared into the night. I didn't even have time to ask her where she was going

Even for me, standing so close to him, there are times when I watch him sitting in front of the piano, his long fingers flying over the keys, and I feel a wave of dizziness. This is because Lu Wei is too perfect, almost like a character cut out from a magazine

When I slowed my pace, she quickened hers, and when I caught up to her and walked alongside her, she deliberately slowed down again

During this period, my mother's obsession with cleanliness has intensified. She demands that the floors be mopped twice a day, once in the morning and once in the afternoon, and she insists on repeatedly wiping the doorknobs until they emit a faint scent of lemon.

There is no way, my mind is already filled with too many things, such as the vocabulary I didn't finish memorizing last night and the two pages of CET-4 exam questions scheduled for today, as well as the increasing number of absences by Xiaoyu, and that Ye Mubei who often interrupts my train of thought

Her eyes are red, as if she has been crying

Just when I thought she was about to make a move again, I heard her shout at me.

A black bird suddenly swooped past in front of me and landed on a tree beside the playground, squawking loudly.

I stared at her with wide eyes, my head buzzing: "What did you say? I don't understand..."

However, I clearly overestimated my arm strength; her heavy body pressed down on me, causing me to stumble and nearly fall.

During this period, I have been reflecting back and forth, wondering what exactly I said wrong at that time

Is there really any point in doing it so insincerely

Ye Mubei

I made every effort to suppress the expression of surprise on my face, avoiding letting my gaze linger on the red bruises that marked her arms

A chill ran through my heart, and I shook my head, saying, "No need, I will go upstairs." Then, carrying my heavy backpack, I returned to my room

There is a voice in my heart telling me that those matters requiring wit and courage, those that necessitate exhausting one's brain to connect with the hearts of others, are actually not my forte at all

Upon returning to my own room, I was tormented throughout the night by the faint sounds of vomiting and sharp cries that emerged from the silence. These sounds felt like tiny needles, occasionally piercing my heart, causing me great pain

Haha

Lu Weilai arrived just in time; I am in urgent need of someone to confide in.

My tone has intensified, yes, I am angry, my chest feels like it is about to explode! It turns out that in Xiyu's heart, I have always been a fool. A heavy sense of powerlessness washes over me

God knows how much beer she has been poured!

In the next moment, I saw her hand raised high.

I want to say, placing hope on me, Aunt Chen has truly bet on the wrong horse

You should know how strong she is; stopping an enthusiastic girl from putting down her cup is a very dangerous thing! Ye Mubei shrugged his shoulders, looking completely indifferent, and even wanted to take credit, saying, "I safely delivered her to her doorstep; shouldn't you thank me?"

I never knew that in her eyes, I was merely a complete fool, that my care and concern were nothing but insincere gestures, that it turned out...

Lu Wei has always been a representative figure of justice and strength in the academy, and he is an indispensable presence at every opening ceremony, standing on the podium as the student representative, welcoming the adoring gazes of countless junior female students

Perhaps I should start with things that are closer to her life? For example, the night market, billiards, or that person who takes her for a ride on a heavy motorcycle

"Xing An, can you take Xiao Yu to school with you today?" Aunt Chen looked at me with a hopeful expression

I often see those low-quality thin T-shirts that pill after just two washes fluttering in the wind on the windowsill of the restroom

I was momentarily taken aback, looking at Lin Xiaoyu's tightly closed eyes and flushed cheeks, and surprisingly, I couldn't think of a rebuttal right away. I could only join him in carrying the person inside.

It is said that Xiao Yu has skipped class again. Lu Wei did not say much, merely raised a hand to cover his eyes, then let out a long sigh, appearing utterly exhausted.

Xiaoyu, at least go to the academy properly today! Go see the teachers and classmates, don't just sneak out as soon as you step outside, this cannot continue! Aunt Chen looked at me, then at Xiaoyu, and I faintly heard despair in her voice.

Is he with that super handsome person from our college

However, within a two-meter radius around her, there exists a silence profound enough to isolate it into another world

That night, as usual, was a sweltering evening. Mother was on a business trip to another city, and no one mentioned Xiaoyu's whereabouts anymore

Aunt Chen has already met with the homeroom teacher? I felt as if I had been struck by lightning, completely unable to think. I had no knowledge of any of this; I have not spoken to your mother!

With that slap, Xiaoyu's nails cut into Lu Wei's cheek, leaving a deep and long wound that oozed bright red blood beads

You are about to attend an interview soon, aren't you? It would be better to focus your energy on the exam!" he said, gently patting my head, "Don't let Aunt Chen have another worry; she will cry!

She and I seem to never be on the same wavelength, parallel yet distant from each other

After all, that was her youth, something she possessed and I did not have

I... I don't know..." I shrank my neck and lowered my head

I have grown accustomed to the indifference that Xiaoyu shows me; she no longer wears the clothes I left for her, but instead opts for dresses she has found in small shops by the roadside

I threw the bag onto the sofa, sitting alone in the living room, recalling what Lu Wei had said, that he would handle it well, yet until now, I have not seen the dawn's arrival

Although I found her in the billiard room, I have no understanding of her thoughts regarding her studies. The worst part is that she is now avoiding me everywhere, and she is even unwilling to say a word.

I looked at Xiaoyu's face, while she merely lowered her head, gazing at my shoes. Then she raised her hand to smooth the hair beside her cheek, so that it would cover her flushed right cheek.

How could someone like you possibly understand my feelings

I jumped out of bed and leaned against the window

Are you a fool? Why are you not reviewing for such an important exam and meddling in my affairs as a troubled girl? My father did not entrust me to you, so why do you have to make things difficult for me?

He threw the person onto the sofa, and Ye Mubei turned around and left without even a word of greeting

Time has been stretched by Aunt Chen's longing gaze, as she looks at me as if I were a straw on the edge of a cliff

Yet in my heart, it feels as if there are one hundred thousand cats scratching up and down, a one hundred thousandfold entanglement

In a daze, carrying my backpack, I almost bumped into the glass door on the first floor. I must have looked quite foolish. I took a deep breath and nervously glanced around, just in time to meet Lu Wei's surprised gaze.

Face-to-face communication yields no results; she is like a kite with a broken string, and I can only watch helplessly as she drifts further and further away, unable to do anything.

Her long hair brushed against my face, carrying a scent of smoke. She didn't even glance at me, as if I were merely a decoration hanging on the door. Yet, in that fleeting moment, I caught sight of her swollen eyes.

Because... because you are a very important friend to me! I do not want you to continue like this.

But I feel that it seems to be shouting: "What to do? What to do? What to do?"

A night of chaos has passed

Are you referring to Ye Mubei? Do not underestimate him; he has a powerful background and his driving skills are quite impressive. Have you seen his turning technique? It is simply stunning beyond measure

"We have English class today. Do you want me to lend you my notes?"

I did not expect Aunt Chen to be so willing to take action. I think she must have been extremely angry, and for quite some time. Upon realizing this, I suddenly felt a wave of heartache.

The term "young and reckless" is most appropriately applied to Ye Mubei

Why not tell her

His excellent grades, which are proportional to his handsome face, always make one lament the unfairness of God, as so many wonderful things are concentrated in him

I shot him a glare: "If you can persuade her to go home early and sleep, instead of following you around causing trouble, I would be even more grateful to you!" Then, I tried to help the dazed Xiaoyu down from the motorcycle.

Do not thank me; perhaps it is precisely because I have always been so good that she has become this way. Your father dotes on you, my mother dotes on me, and the two of us dote on her

He and I are both at the age of youthful exuberance, full of potential. But what about me? What can I do? ... Skip class to go to the nearby shop for mango ice, or pull a top student from class to accompany me to a movie at midnight, fully indulging in dropping a trivial subject, or even ...? ... Engage in a passionate romance?

Moreover, I do not know which nerve my topic has touched again, or if it is the aftereffects of her hangover, but her complexion has been getting worse and worse

You really did a great job! You must be very happy to report me, right? Seeing me get beaten up actually makes you happy, doesn't it? You must have been secretly laughing under the covers last night, right? My mother has never been so harsh with me from childhood to now! When I was 10 years old and smeared ketchup on your father's treasured painting "The Return of the Traveler," she wasn't that harsh! The homeroom teacher even told my mother that all the personal and sick leave I had taken before would be counted as absenteeism, and I am going to be warned by the college! Do you know that?

I looked up helplessly at Lu Wei, who was deep in thought, tightly pursing his lips as if contemplating a vast and complex higher algebra problem

Youth may indeed be meant for squandering, and his capital is undoubtedly substantial, for he possesses ample courage. As for me, I can only stand at a distance, enviously observing from outside the circle

Realizing that I had once again involuntarily thought of him, I hurriedly pulled back my racing thoughts, only to once again recognize his danger

I thought I was so nervous that I began to hallucinate, and I actually heard Lu Wei's voice

You have never been beaten, so you do not know what it feels like? You will understand once you have been beaten.

My posture while riding a bicycle is quite stylish!

I suddenly opened my eyes and realized that this was not a dream. Apart from Ye Mubei, there was no other means of transportation in this community that could shatter the dreams of all its residents.

She still skips classes, only occasionally appearing in the classroom, casually wandering around as if to mark her attendance

I lay in bed, wearing headphones, gradually drifting into a dreamland amidst the powerful and resonant voice of a woman

However, it seems that everything I say comes out so pale, like a crumbling wall on the top floor that has already weathered.

In my dream, I heard the sound of a motorcycle engine, a familiar yet unfamiliar sound, coming from afar and gradually becoming clearer.

Lin Xiaoyu cast a disdainful glance at that hand, seemingly a bit impatient, and shook her body aimlessly.

In this atmosphere, I felt a heaviness in my chest that made it hard to breathe. I glanced at her several times, but her gaze remained fixed ahead.

The most outrageous thing I can do is probably limited to this. However, even this simple act is something I cannot accomplish

Upon returning home, the living room inside the door was empty. Looking at the wall full of certificates, I suddenly felt a sense of disorientation

Xiaoyu was taken aback, her face instantly flushed red.

Forget it, your notes are too profound, and I may not necessarily understand them

I hate you the most!" Xiaoyu cried out as she ran away

Did you not know? He went street racing yesterday and then had an accident

Lu Wei still held her hand, raising his voice. I had never seen him so fierce; his eyes even turned red.

Lu Wei released her hand, and with a loud slap, the palm that was originally meant to land on my cheek resoundingly struck Lu Wei's left cheek instead

What acting? What are you talking about?