Six

When I go crazy, I am more terrifying than Qing Tian. She just kept saying to Zhou Jianian, "I like you, we can make it, let's try being together." But when I stood at the entrance of the station with my luggage and ticket blocking Zhou Jianian, what I said was, "You must be with me"

No longer returning, there is no need to bear the condemnation from traditional morals

I raised my head to look at Zhou Jianian, and I was on the verge of tears

I had truly eaten too much, and I implored him to take me for a walk to help with digestion. I was fully prepared to be refused, but unexpectedly, he agreed.

Let Su Wei replace the world that has wronged him to make amends, let me use all my strength to bring him out of the past filled with indifference and lack of love, let me offer this vibrant heart with both hands for him to take at will

The desolation of that time can be summarized in a few words: no resentment, no anger, no contention, and cultivating oneself in solitude

O gods, be silent! O all things, fade away! I only desire this moment, for this moment is a lifetime

While I was washing the dishes with the elderly, Zhou Jianian was sitting in the yard, playing happily with that little black dog. He held a cigarette in his hand, blowing smoke rings at the little black dog. The stars in the rural night sky were so bright, and I think I will never forget that scene for the rest of my life

My nose tinged with a sour sensation, and I almost shed tears; fortunately, I managed to hold them back in time and forced a smile at the elderly person. Well, I certainly cannot tell the elder that it was not Zhou Jianian who brought me here, but rather that I shamelessly followed along on my own.

A few minutes later, he called and said, "I really dislike texting; it's clearer to talk on the phone. I truly have something to attend to next week, and I will speak to Yihan myself about it."

That night I slept in the guest room, while he slept on the sofa in the guest room. I woke up in the middle of the night feeling thirsty and saw the moonlight shining on his face

One must eventually repay what is owed; it is time for me to settle my debts.

At that moment, I wondered if this person had violent tendencies. If I were to marry him, would he hit me every day at home?

The yard was covered with peanuts drying in the sun, and as soon as I stepped in, I crushed a few. Zhou Jianian turned around and glared at me, and I immediately fell silent.

Suddenly, there was a moment of silence on that end. For some reason, I felt that the same smile from last time reappeared on his face, and for a moment, I did not know how to respond.

All the blame shall be borne by me alone

It would have been enough to just serve it, yet they kept shoving it into my hands, as if afraid I would be polite.

He suddenly felt that if Su Wei were not Lu Yihan's girlfriend, if Su Wei were just Su Wei, merely a girl named Su Wei, how much simpler everything would be!

Never has anyone made Su Wei so neurotic and cautious

However, I still firmly argue that if I have clearly fallen in love with someone else yet insist on staying with Lu Yihan, then that would be the true betrayal of love

Grandma Zhou whispered to me, "My dear, Jianian has never brought a girl home. If you don't mind this place, please come and visit Grandma more often in the future"

Many people have commented below, saying that it is truly beautiful and has a wonderful temperament

During the days of my disappearance, Lu Yihan had to make an average of three to four calls each day to inquire whether Chen Mobei had any news about me. On one hand, Chen Mobei was gritting his teeth in anger at me in his heart, while on the other hand, he had to conceal my whereabouts, which was quite arduous.

He turned his face to me and asked teasingly, Aren't you afraid of not having a private bathroom? Aren't you afraid of having to empty the sputum bowl yourself?

Zhou Jianian resembled a starving ghost, completely engrossed in his meal. When Grandma Zhou asked him to serve me some dishes, he ignored her, glaring at me with rice in his mouth, "Don't you have hands yourself"

How could I not be afraid? Just hearing him say that makes me want to vomit, but I cannot show it. Otherwise, from that moment on, how would he see me differently from how he sees Qing Tian or other girls?

Just when I was feeling despondent and considering hanging up the phone, he suddenly said, "I will be going back to the countryside next Saturday to visit my grandmother"

It was only when Chen Mobei looked at me with a cold expression that I realized my own foolishness; how could I have thought to seek his help? At this moment, he must despise someone like me, who is unfaithful in matters of the heart.

After getting on the bus, I turned off my phone. Since I had purchased a standing ticket, I could only awkwardly stand in the narrow aisle, unsure of what to do as the passing carts came and went.

Half an hour later, he finally got up and pulled me over to sit in his seat. An aunt next to us smiled and said, "Young people in love just like to be stubborn."

He replied to me saying that he has something to attend to and cannot go, but he wanted to wish you a happy birthday in advance

No longer returning, there is no need to face the bustling and noisy city again

After a pause, I said, I didn't originally think this trip was for shopping in Hong Kong, you don't need to look at me like that, I am not afraid of any difficult circumstances

Lan Shan was truly unfortunate; she appeared in Chen Mo Bei's life during his most disheartened and dismal moments. Years later, Chen Mo Bei himself had to admit that the reason he initially approached Lan Shan was not due to her stunning beauty, nor out of admiration, but rather because of his loneliness

We walked one after the other on the country path, the air filled with the fragrance of plants. I looked at the slender figure ahead and suddenly thought, how wonderful it would be if We can make it never returned.

He finally did something that a person would do; he walked behind his grandmother, held onto the elderly woman, and smiled as he said, "Grandma, you misunderstood, she is not your granddaughter-in-law."

He stared into my eyes, and in his bright pupils was my face. He did not need to say anything; his gaze had already conveyed all the words he wished to express but could not. I leaned my head gently against his shoulder, and in that moment, I thought, let me bear all the suffering alone.

Four hours later, I stood in front of the dilapidated platform of the small bus station with Zhou Jianian. I looked at the yellowed walls and the mottled slogans, trying hard to appear indifferent.

Zhou Jianian snorted through his nose, as if in disdain, yet also as if he were unperturbed by the oddity

I looked at her pale face and wondered what it would look like if she cried

Meanwhile, I racked my brains and replied with a message: Why can't you come? Lu Yihan will be very disappointed

I say, I am a new woman of the new era, unafraid to pursue true love, regardless of the cost I may have to pay

It was originally agreed that we would go hiking together on the weekend, but due to my irresponsibility, Chen Mobei could only go alone. Just as he was about to log off QQ, Lanshan's avatar lit up.

How can I let Lu Yihan know that I fabricated such a lie, so I hurriedly said, never mind, never mind, never mind.

He laughed contemptuously and casually said, "Do as you please"

The elderly retire early; she returned to her room to sleep before nine o'clock. Before going to bed, she even prepared a new bedding for me. I secretly asked Zhou Jianian, "I will sleep on the bed, where will you sleep?"

If it is said that in our long and arduous youth, everyone has encountered a calamity, then that photograph marks the beginning of Lin Lanshan's calamity

Everything has been completely turned upside down; Su Wei, who used to only know how to accept, has begun to understand what it means to give.

Lan Shan is a girl of a completely different type from Gu Meng, and also entirely different from Qing Tian and me. Before and after her, we have never seen such a serene and carefree face.

She then warmly pulled me into the house, asking me what I would like to eat and drink. Before I had the chance to respond, she brought out many snacks that I loved during my childhood, such as peanut brittle, winter melon candy, and pistachios

He still looks like a corpse, who said you sleep in the bed? I sleep in the bed, you sleep on the floor

Meanwhile, Chen Mobei uploaded the photos he took at the photography exhibition to the forum's discussion board. The girl he photographed was wearing a bright red sweater, and her demeanor was proud and aloof, creating a striking contrast with the red she wore.

The next day, Chen Mobei received an internal message. The profile picture belonged to a person resembling Crayon Shin-chan, who said, "I am the girl in the red sweater. Please send me the original photo."

Chen Mobei let out a cold laugh; he felt that it was simply not worth reasoning with someone like me

As I thought this, I uncontrollably stepped forward and slipped my hand into his pocket. His hand, which had originally been in his pocket, clearly paused for a moment, and during that pause, I felt my heart leap to my throat

I am unhappy again, this crow's mouth, how does he know that I am not his grandmother's granddaughter-in-law!

It was only when I arrived at Grandma Zhou's house that I realized this scoundrel had deceived me; the environment is not that poor, it simply cannot compare to the splendor of the city, and daily life is not a problem at all

How many lonely individuals in this world toss and turn in the unchanging night, and how many couples on the streets of every city merely hold each other's hands out of fear of solitude

I fabricated a lie, sending a text message to Zhou Jianian saying that next Saturday is my birthday, hoping my friends will honor me with their presence. This message is sent to multiple recipients, Su Wei

Grandma Zhou first smiled as she looked up and down at Zhou Jianian, and only then did she notice me curled up behind him, smiling more awkwardly than crying. At the moment her eyes, somewhat clouded by the erosion of time, fell upon me, they sparkled.

God knows why I am like this. In the past, I looked down on those girls who played tricks for the sake of boys. It turns out I am not as different as I thought. When I truly want to get close to someone, I too will go to great lengths.

Since Gu Meng began to avoid him, he has also been too lazy to seek her out. However, on sleepless nights, with no one to talk to, he feels quite frustrated

It took an immense effort to gradually obtain information about him, each time pretending to be casual while encouraging Lu Yihan to contact him, feigning calmness as I meticulously gathered snippets of information about him at every gathering, discreetly finding his name on Lu Yihan's phone, memorizing that number, and daring not to save it on my own phone for fear of alarming him.

That evening, Grandma Zhou prepared a lot of dishes for dinner. Seeing that I was too thin, she was worried that I wouldn't be full, so she even served my rice in a vegetable bowl. Holding that bowl of white rice piled high like a mountain, I pondered to myself that this was probably the amount of carbohydrates I usually consumed in a day.

I lifted my head to glance at Zhou Jianian, who remained expressionless.

She is reserved in speech and seldom smiles, not out of suppressed emotions, but rather a genuine calmness. Later, we came to understand that the essence of her character is shaped by the genes inherited from her mother.

Chen Mobei later swore that he had only invited her on a whim. I raised my eyebrows and smiled, saying that it didn't matter what his original intention was, as the goal had been achieved anyway

He looked at me, his face displaying an inscrutable expression. He said, "Su Wei, your behavior would likely result in being punished by being submerged in a pig cage in ancient times"

But I did not open my mouth to plead with Zhou Jianian to give up his seat for me. I clearly understand that the path I have chosen will lead to challenges in the future that will be more arduous than standing for four hours.

Loneliness is the terminal illness of the century, and none of us in this generation can escape it

But he did not, did not speak harshly as I had thought, nor did he push my hand away

I walked over barefoot, squatted in front of him, and gently kissed him

In my lifetime, there has never been a moment as fervent as this; it is also the first time I have come to realize that I can love someone with such passion, rather than merely adopting a reserved posture to accept the love and admiration of others

Zhou Jianian replied to my message a day later. At that time, I was accompanying Chen Mobei to a photography exhibition. When my phone vibrated, I glanced at it absentmindedly, and after that glance, I almost wanted to scream in public!

I think I am probably going mad, and the reason that drives me to madness may very well be what is known as love

In fact, I have previously gone home to have dinner with several boyfriends, and meeting the parents is something I am quite accustomed to. However, I do not know why, I have never been this nervous before. I slowly moved behind Zhou Jianian and tightly grasped his sleeve, completely losing the composure of an Oscar-winning actress.

He gently held it, with his fingers interlocked.

I feign nonchalance; my acting skills are indeed superior to those of Chen Mobei and Gu Meng. If they are merely third-rate television actors, then I am an Oscar-winning actress

I stood at the entrance of the station, wearing a sports outfit and holding a motorcycle helmet, blocking Zhou Jianian. I admit that I deceived him; this day is not my birthday, but it is a day of great significance to me

He raised the DSLR he won in the company anniversary celebration lottery and pressed the shutter button aimed at a girl standing quietly in the crowd

I will not go back, so there is no need to face the entangled relationships again

But until she left us and went to Beijing, I had never seen her shed a single tear

I hurriedly shook Chen Mobei and said, please teach me how to respond, my mind is not functioning!

It was only after we were together that he admitted that when he saw the so-called mass message I sent, he suddenly felt that Su Wei wasn't actually that annoying after all

But if I don't eat, it will surely hurt the elderly's feelings, so I can only cry inside while smiling on the surface as I shovel food into my mouth

He called out loudly for his grandmother, and then I saw an elderly lady with unsteady steps walk out from the inner room

There is no need to return, and thus no need to pay attention to the voices of self-blame and guilt within.

After I became friends with her, I asked her why she was willing to go hiking with Chen Mobei that day. She replied to me nonchalantly, saying it was because he was handsome.